"Look I called over an hour ago where in the hell is my Large Pizza?"
posted by Paul Kenjerski 17:37
'Gifted' children often become troubled adults
Intelligent children who are told they are gifted are more likely to have emotional problems than bright ones told nothing. A survey has revealed that 40% of them had difficulty forming relationships in later life and normally ended up in mundane jobs. The findings were made after both types of children and a randomly selected group were compared between the ages of 14 and 27. None of those in the other groups had any such problems. It was found many parents who encourage their children to believe they are gifted discourage them from having relationships with youngsters they believe are not good enough. This leads to boredom at school and an attitude which persists through life,
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:53
After reading the works of many great Philosophers... I realize one thing.. Drugs ain't so bad. And... people with education can make dog shit sound like grey poupon. It's all about knowledge and the spin. I am as intelligent as Neitzche, Ross, Gabbard, and Mont-Claire. The only difference is... I didn't live in the age of stupidity. Anyone with enough money can portray an image of godliness.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 04:30
Drugs aren't so bad. It's the addiction that is bad. So shouldn't it be "The war on Addiction". I am addicted to lots of things. Like coffee, tea, music, money, driving fast, being bad, not cleaning up my room, internet, work, sleep, air, information, knowledge, and the ladies. So shouldn't there be a war on this stuff as well?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 04:26
The number of adults behind bars, on parole or on probation reached a record 6.47 million in 2000 -- or one in 32 American adults, the government reported Sunday.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:00
We will all be under lock and key someday
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:24
I like being blobby. Nowadays, it seems like a lot of punk bands are getting buff. I don't really get it. Tim from Rancid looks like he could lift me over his head. Davey from AFI looks like he could lift 2 of me over his head. H20, Bouncing Souls, even Green Day are lifting weights. Backstage of the warped tour looks like World's Gym. Call me old fashion, but I like being lazy and sluggish. Being fat is a state of mind, not just a body type. Being fat is punk. It's telling society you don't care if they think you're a big fat slob. Who would you rather be in Animal House, Bluto or Neidermeyer? John Goodman from Roseanne, or Bob Saget from Full House? Misfits or Poison Idea? Well, that's a tough one. I'm not saying you should strive to be a 6. FATMIKE---
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:21
Sasha Abramsky ... My hat is off to you. Anyone... Do a search on Yahoo and read anything Sasha has ever wrote.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:34
READ THIS
In October, Human Rights Watch and the D.C.-based Sentencing Project released a twenty-six-page report titled "Losing the Vote: The Impact of Felony Disenfranchisement Laws in the United States." The report revealed that throughout the country, 3.9 million parolees, ex-prisoners, and prisoners cannot vote. And because of several little-known laws in fourteen states -- mainly in the South -- more than two million of them will never vote again: convicted of a felony, their disenfranchisement is permanent. Of those, 1.4 million are black men, including one in three black men in Alabama and Florida. In Iowa, Mississippi, New Mexico, Virginia, Washington, and Wyoming, one in four black men cannot vote.
THEN GO HERE. AND SEE WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:32
I believe it is time for a serious re-evaluation of human priorities. As a species of such advanced intelligence and technology, we have the tendency to think of nothing but human advancement. We view the human race as being separate and above the life cycles of nature. This ideology of superiority over all things living and of the very land itself is leading to a large rupture in the natural order. One need not look far to see the ill effects of the "beneficial" technology.Just count the number of super-fund sites or toxic/nuclear waste dumps. The hole in the ozone layer, that grows larger year by year with the ever rising climate temperature. The loss of wild areas, in search of more, always more, resources. These are just a few of the examples of destruction (there are many more) that the mindset of "human first" is causing. The very fact that we know the use of petrol chemicals releases toxins and pollutants into the ground water and the atmosphere attests to our continued willingness to ignore our impact upon our environment.
The reason for this willingness is, of course, that we have not yet significantly suffered the results of our actions. Although cancer is on the rise, the rate of extinction is increasing and natural disasters that have never occurred in certain regions of the world are becoming common,(i.e. tornadoes in Southern California), as a general rule we wish not to think of these things. No longer can we separate ourselves from wild nature, pretending that technology will keep us safe and intact. We must accept and embrace the fact that we, too, are a part of the natural life cycle, not above it, not on top of it. We must scrutinize the effect that we are having.
It is time for us to once again learn to live in harmony with the Earth and the other inhabitants of it. I am not suggesting that we go back to a completely primitive lifestyle, for we have forgotten far too many survival instincts for that. But we must have a reprieve of advanced, oppressive, life controlling technology. We must learn to live sustainably or become completely artificial. We have the means to change, the question is, do we have the desire?
FREE-
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:09
What is wrong with drugs?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:07
While glimpsing through a issue of Rolling stone I came across the disturbing story of this guy. This is just another nail in the coffin of America. This is not the land of the free anymore.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:06
I am quickly loosing whatever respect I had for the US. All that land of the free bullshit we learned in school seems to be just that, fairy tales told to children. We are a society of nonthinkers and we walk with our eyes closed, unaware of the world around us.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:05
FORD vs. FIRESTONELawyers defending Bridgestone/Firestone against accusations their tires caused a highway wreck said their client was blameless - and then pointed to the vehicle's manufacturer as a culprit.
No company sets out to design an unsafe vehicle. But creating a car always involves making trade-offs among engineering, manufacturing, safety, sales and advertising components as well as responding to consumer and competitive pressures. It is a wildly expensive process that takes five years or so to complete.
Look at the Explorer, you can easily see that if a tire blows out its gonna roll.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:42
Everything at Mcdonalds has meat in it! Everything! Duhh!!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:26
A pigeon trained to courier drugs between Holland and Germany was caught after landing in the wrong place with marijuana attached to its feet.
A German pigeon breeder from Bunderneuland, near the Dutch border, took the bird to the police after it landed at his home.
The drugs packet was attached to the bird's leg. Police are still trying to trace its owner.
A Bunderneuland police spokesman said: "We have heard of isolated incidents of this sort of thing happening before. Fortunately, the amounts concerned are always relatively small."
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:21
A TOTAL of 2,071,686 people were incarcerated in the United States at the end of last year.
The new figures consolidate the US lead over China and Russia in the total number of people behind bars, according to a list compiled by the British Home Office.
The Chinese prison population was 1.4 million at the end of the 1990s while Russia's did not exceed one million inmates, the list showed.
The US number includes those held in federal, state and local facilities as well as detention centres run by the US military and the Immigration and Naturalisation Service.
Although the prison population rose only 1.3 per cent during 2000 – the smallest annual growth rate since 1972 – the slowdown was not enough to prevent the United States from reaching the two-million mark.
The rate of incarceration at the end of last year was 478 sentenced inmates per 100,000 US residents.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:01
now here is an interesting site about Atlantis. If you check it out I would have to go with section 2. I remember seeing Ducktales so long ago and seeing an episode about Atlantis. Now all those Disney movies are out. I love all that shit. I really really do. Eldorado, Atlantis, and even the fountain of Youth.... Those mystical places that are no more, or can't be found, but maybe than can... have you looked personally?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:44
The supposed Drug war is a war against ever american citizen. Everyone I know has uses or has used drugs. The president even used drugs. I know of cops and mayors and officials that use. Useing drugs is part of being human. So who are they really trying to fight here? The poor black man. When this drug shit finally hits the fan and they realise that its futile. They will let all the people out of prison for those charges that simply don't exist anymore. I would sue...... its someones life not a thing that can be taken lightly. What a fucked up world we live in.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:08
Small homemade bombs, apparently aimed at calling attention to a little-known rebel group, exploded outside three Mexico City banks causing slight damage and no injuries, city authorities said on Thursday.Banks after insurance companies are the biggest assholes around. They steal... I hate banks...
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:03
PUNK ROCK IS STARTING A BAND WITH SOME FRIENDS WHO HAVE NEVER PLAYED AN INSTRAMENT BEFORE, AND PEOPLE COME TO YOUR SHOWS AND ACTUALLY LIKE YOU EVEN THOUGH YOU TOTALLY SUCK.
Fat Mike
posted by Paul Kenjerski 23:16
The best RANCID site yet!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 05:53
Following the Warped Tour, Rancid will head to Europe and Japan for a series of festival shows before returning home to record their sixth album.
This is very good news for any Rancid fans, also Lars had this to say about the rumours that Rancid were going to break up after the Warped Tour:
"I say this from the stage every night; Rancid will be making records in eighty years," Frederiksen says. "Families don't break up, not this one anyway. That's what we are first and foremost, a musical fucking family. My kids and Tim's kids will be growing on the jungle gym together, getting tattooed at the age of five.."ANOTHER ALBUM.... I CAN NOT JUST SIT HERE AND WAIT!!!!!!!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 05:49
A Muskegon man who authorities say admitted he was "huffing" propane and smoking marijuana, causing his house to blow up, now faces a felony charge. According to the arrest warrant, Miller allegedly intended to use the cylinder containing propane for the unlawful purpose of inhaling hydrocarbons ... to cause "a condition of intoxication, euphoria, excitement, exhilaration, stupefaction or dulling of the ... nervous system, also known as huffing."So is he getting fined for the pot, or for being a dumbass?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:53
Timothy DiPaolo, 26, was interviewing for a job at the sheriff's department when he admitted that he had made pipe bombs and exploded them in the past, according to Chief Deputy Richard Gagliano. After further questioning, DiPaolo told police he had recently made another bomb, but had not exploded it. He later brought the bomb to the sheriff's office to be dismantled and was taken into custody. Gagliano said members of the State Police Explosive Disposal Unit disarmed the device, which could have been detonated. DiPaolo was charged with criminal use of explosives, a Class C felony. He is being held at Cumberland County Jail on bail of $5,000 cash or $25,000 property. DiPaolo faces up to five years in prison, though Gagliano said the bombs were not exploded around other people.Who knew this was against the law?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:50
My patio is well lit by the summer sun, which illuminates the floor and the adjacent walls. Last year I noticed that when a bird flew overhead, it cast a shadow on the patio. The bird was flying at the correct height to just clear the wall on my right. Its shadow moved across the patio floor at the same speed as the bird. However, when the shadow reached the base of the wall, it accelerated instantly, climbing the wall before reaching the top and continuing along the flat roof, again at the same speed as the bird. If the bird had been an object travelling at the speed of light, then the shadow on the ground and the flat roof would have also been travelling at the speed of light. But what of the period when the shadow was travelling up the wall? Under this condition, the shadow would have had to travel faster than the speed of light, which would present a direct challenge to Einstein. Is there any other explanation?Do you have nothing better to do than think of questions which are fundamentally easy to answer, but you yourself are to stupid to solve?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:47
Over a period of thirty-five years, General Electric Company dumped an estimated 500,000 kilograms (1.1 million pounds) of polychlorinated biphenyls, or PCBs, into the river. The chemical, which is linked to cancers in humans, was banned in 1977.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:39
The world's population may reach a peak of nine billion as early as 2070 and then start to shrink, according to a new analysis by Austrian researchers. Lutz thinks declining fertility rates around the world are the main driving force behind the slowing in population growth. The population will start to shrink when the average number of children per woman falls below 2.1 In some parts of Europe, fertility levels have already dropped dramatically. In Spain, the average number of children per woman is 1.2. In Russia the figure is 1.1.I think that in areas of severe hunger and economic futility there is a overwhelming feeling of the species to not want to propagate. Why should they make it harder upon themselves by briniging a child into this world?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:38
Injuries resulting from falls from playground equipment are responsible for a higher proportion of severe injuries than bicycle or motor vehicle crashes, according to a new Children's Hospital Medical Center of Cincinnati study of emergency department visits throughout the United States.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 18:45
The goverment wants you to smoke
The early deaths associated with smoking have economic benefits, according to a controversial report commissioned by Philip Morris Inc. According to the report, the Czech Republic saved about $147 million in 1997 through the deaths of smokers who would not live long enough to use healthcare or housing for the elderly. The study was compiled as a cost-benefit analysis and delivered to the Czech Government. It applied the savings against the income tax lost and cost of caring for smokers before they died. But tobacco industry opponents have attacked the report as an attempt to show that governments benefit from smoking related deaths.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 18:42
Scientists are saying there's a 9 out of 10 chance that the global average temperature will rise by 3 to 9 degrees Fahrenheit over the next century, and a 4 to 6 degree increase is the most likely scenario. The scientists are reporting on a new probability analysis. The most likely projected increase is five times the one-degree temperature rise observed over the past century. By as early as 2030 the planet is likely to heat up by a degree or two, the scientists say. The study is published in the July 20 issue of the journal Science.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 18:41
Few outside Russia pay attention to who's getting elected in the boonies. They'd better wake up. At the grass roots, Russia is going communist again. In two key regions of the Russian Federation, communist candidates were elected to the governorships Sunday. No fluke elections, they are of enormous importance, politically and geographically, for these reasons:
• They tipped the scales. Only 10 years after the collapse of the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics, 45 of the 89 regions of the Russian federation are now in the hands of Communist Party governors.
• Within Russia, that is not considered startling. With shrugs of their shoulders, Russians in the streets have increasingly come to accept communist governors as the wave of the future, just one more reflection of the economic hard times besetting the Motherland.
• In both of Sunday's regional elections, a little more than a third of the eligible voters turned out – below par for Russians in the decade during which they have had the vote. It is being regarded as a sense of resignation among Russian voters, who have seen little improvement in their lives since the advent of a democratic form of government in 1991 to replace the dictatorship of the Soviet Union. Gennady Zyuganov, leader of the Communist Party of the Russian Federation, likes to say that people are once more turning to the Communists because the decade of reforms – beginning with Boris Yeltsin and continuing under his successor, President Vladimir Putin – has not delivered the fruits promised.
• The communist governorships are being considered as working to Putin's advantage. As the Russian newspaper Izvestia put it: "It is clear that it makes no difference for the Kremlin what [political] color the governor is. The main point is that he should be loyal to the president and the government."
• These communist election victories occurred in areas traditionally least likely to be hospitable to communism. According to Izvestia, "the Communists have [in past elections there] been supported by fewer voters than in the country on an average."
• Nor did these latest elections take place in some "red spot" of concentrated communist power on the sprawling map of Russia, which spans 11 time zones – nearly half-way around the globe. The capital cities of the two regions involved in Sunday's elections are more than 4,000 miles apart.
• They are in regions crucial to Russia's economic power – and, in one instance, to its relationship with communist China because it is so close to the Russian-Chinese border. One of the elections was held in the Nizhni Novgorod region, known during the Soviet Union days as Gorky. It is a lynchpin in the Russian economy. Although about 250 miles east of Moscow, it is looked upon as an industrial subsidiary of the Russian capital. Nizhni Novgorod is one of the country's half-dozen largest metropolitan areas, a major industrial center producing aircraft, automobiles and trucks, agricultural machinery, plastics, textiles and electrical equipment. The victor there was Gennady Khodyrev, who was once the senior secretary of the Gorky Regional Committee of the Communist Party of the Soviet Union. The other region electing a communist governor this week is Irkutsk, lying north of Mongolia. The city of Irkutsk, near the shore of Lake Baikal, is a principal center of commerce on the Trans-Siberian Railroad. Throughout its history it has looked to trade with China and the Amur Valley, a border area of contention between Russia and China. One of the purposes of the recent Moscow-Beijing Treaty of Friendship was to dampen those tensions. Now, a communist Irkutsk, so close to communist China, could well send a chilling signal to Putin.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 18:31
DETROIT - Michigan police have used the state's law enforcement database to stalk women, threaten motorists and settle scores, the Detroit Free Press reported Tuesday. The newspaper examined hundreds of pages of records for the Law Enforcement Information Network and concluded that abusers have turned the high-tech crime fighting tool into a personal search engine. The Free Press said it found more than 90 Michigan police officers, dispatchers, federal agents and security guards have misused the LEIN system. "I wouldn't doubt that it happens very often," said Lawrence Carey, former Plymouth Township police chief. "A lot of them are taken care of internally." LEIN was set up in 1967. It searches the FBI's National Crime Information Center, the Michigan Secretary of State vehicle registration system and driving histories along with other databases. It can tell police whether there are outstanding warrants on an individual, whether an individual is a sex offender, was reported missing or is deemed dangerous, as well as confidential information such as an individual's address or whether someone has a suppressed juvenile record. A suburban Detroit jail guard, whose Internet name is "BRN 2B NAKED," allegedly used LEIN to gather personal information about a woman he met on the Internet. He then allegedly stalked the woman and later was fired for conduct unbecoming to an officer.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 18:27
The United States is up to its usual bullshit. It really pisses me off that the once great free united states is becoming nothing more than a tolitarianistic goverment. Controlling its people like they're slaves.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 19:01
If punk fans can't get excited about Rancid, and if the band's legendary players Tim Armstrong and Lars Frederiksen have to ask the crowd repeatedly to form a mosh pit, that's bad. "I was there, and it was hott!.. I was sunburned and there were too many 10 yr olds in the pit.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 17:06
LARGO -- Despite a call from terrified employees, Largo police failed Saturday to investigate a man who allegedly threatened to kill the black manager of a KFC restaurant. It marked the third day within the past week the man had made racist comments about African-Americans, according to store employees. Each time Largo police were summoned to the Walsingham Road restaurant, employees gave officers detailed descriptions of the man and his car. But a police report was never filled out, and an investigation was not launched until the St. Petersburg Times made inquiries Monday. The woman whose life was threatened was stunned by the department's slow response. "The thing that frustrates me is they seemed like they didn't care," said manager Brenda Daniels, who has worked for KFC for 17 years. "You know those black people, you shouldn't be serving those people," Andersen, who is white, said the man had told her. "They should be killed." "I looked into his eyes, and he was full of hatred," said Andersen, 17. "You see that n----- manager, when she leaves, I'm going to kill her," the man said, according to Daniels. Police were summoned a third time. Unable to find the man, an officer escorted Daniels to her car. Neither a description of the man nor his car was broadcast to other officers. McMullen said. "Because we had multiple officers who handled it, we might have missed the boat on it."
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:55
Bush and his interns. I see a couple possibilities.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:32
Three-year-old Harry Branch-Shaw really, really had to pee. So he did what most kids his age would do — he found a tree and let go. Then a city parks officer did what most cops wouldn't: He gave the tyke a $50 summons. Actually, Harry isn't old enough to get a summons, so the cop gave it to his nanny instead. "The whole thing seems so absurd," said mom Gigi Branch-Shaw. "I would've thought the city would have better things to worry about.""Isn't this somewhat messing with the natural way the world works? Don't trees like urine? I mean it's full of Nitrogen and other nutrients for hungry trees."
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:27
If a dog comes after me, I will use any means neccessary to whoop its ass.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:22
These days, police dogs are even being fitted for titanium teeth on their canine incisors to strengthen their bite. The effect is even more frightening for those who find themselves in the glare of a snarling canine officer. Although police dogs are living beings, they are in reality no different from any lethal weapon police officers wield, says David Harris, a professor of law and values at the University of Toledo College of Law. - ABCNEWS
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:21
Unlike Clinton, Bush Smiles Through Rude Greeting
President George Bush got a sharp in-your-face rebuke earlier this month while attending a Philadelphia block party to celebrate July Fourth. But his reaction was unlike anything White House staff had come to expect during the Clinton years.
Philadelphian Bill Langley claims he was in mid-presidential handshake when he told Bush, "I hope you serve only four years. I'm very disappointed in your work so far."
Bush kept smiling and never lost his cool, but through a presidential grin fired back, "Who cares what you think?"
That's not the way Bill Clinton handled up-close and personal criticism from the hoi polloi. Just ask Pat and Glenn Mendoza, who were jailed and later audited by the IRS after Mrs. Mendoza gave Clinton a piece of her mind at a 1996 Chicago food fair.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:14
I really got nothing new to say.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:43
FARK
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:36
What was I gonna say? Oh yeah.. I HATE MONDAYS! and I HATE DOUG!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:29
On average, 482 of every 100,000 black men sentenced to prison are sent there on drug charges, compared with just 36 of every 100,000 white men. The U.S. Department of Justice found that of the drug offenders appearing in state court 37 percent are white and 61 percent are black. Statistics from the Centers for Disease Control conclude that the number of white high school students currently using cocaine in the U.S. is 4.1 percent compared to 1.1 percent of black high school students. That last statistic is worth repeating: White high school kids are almost four times more likely to use cocaine than black youths.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 19:36
When Josef Stalin was on his deathbed he called in two likely successors, to test which one of the two had a better knack for ruling the country. He ordered two birds to be brought in and presented one bird to each of the two candidates. The first one grabbed the bird, but was so afraid that the bird could free himself from his grip and fly away that he squeezed his hand very hard, and when he opened his palm, the bird was dead. Seeing the disapproving look on Stalin's face and being afraid to repeat his rival's mistake, the second candidate loosened his grip so much that the bird freed himself and flew away. Stalin looked at both of them scornfully. "Bring me a bird!" he ordered. They did. Stalin took the bird by its legs and slowly, one by one, he plucked all the feathers from the bird's little body. Then he opened his palm. The bird was laying there naked, shivering, helpless. Stalin looked at him, smiled gently and said, "You see... and he is even thankful for the human warmth coming out of my palm."
posted by Paul Kenjerski 18:59
Welcome to Police state. Where the police do more bad than good. Its become common to fear the police, what power they hold, what they could do with all that power. They come flashing there lights and making loud noises. Like rolling death. More often than not to enforce laws that american citizens never wanted in the first place. Since when did america quit becoming a land ruled by its inhabitants and ruled by its rulers. Cops never come to bring joy or happiness, its always the opposite. The abuse of power is rampant, and only a very small slice of what is bad in the world of the law will ever come to light. Tales of Wife beating cops, and Rapists that get away because they are the enforcers of the great lawmaking system. One question we must ask ourselves is who would want to be a cop anyway? ? One who is likes to inflict misery. Its like being the grim Reaper. To carrry a gun and baton with one thing in mind for they're use. Who wants to be a cop?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:50
I find it totally amazing that packages I buy from online I can track with UPS websites have seen far more of the world than I have. And all on like 5 dollars of shipping and handling. I'm not sure why Transporting a human around the world is so expensive. I mean my Japenese car weighs like 200 times my own weight and it got here... How odd the world is.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:11
I begin to recall what soberness was like, just to have it all dashed away again last night. I do stupid things when I drink. I like to drink. Its what i do. It is as much a part of me now as my hand is a part of my body. I don't really know when I began to realize this. But I do now. I do drink to get drunk, I drink just because I feel I need it. I blew 60 bucks on beer at one time before. Not that cheap beer either. That high power imported shit. I'm not a functioning boozer either. I break and fall apart. Like some gear has become loose and is gonna defile myself. You don't even want to know what I was doing last night, and where I found myself this morning. I don't know, not really... not anymore... And I won't quit either not till I am done. Not till something terrible happens or I am dead. One or the other.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 23:46
Do you remember when we used to dance in the sunlight?
It was such a long time ago since I've felt that good.
Since you've left I haven't been happy
I remember in the park there were kids playing and the wind was blowing.
I sat and watched you chase the leaves across the cool grass
The sun beat down upon me but I wasn't hot
You ran up to me and laid next to me and wrapped my arm around you
You said never to let you go
but I did for a moment
Now your gone
I haven't seen your face, your eyes staring back at me
in so very long
I've forgotten what it felt like to be alive
I'm empty, just a shell
I miss dancing in the sunlight.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:08
I got a new electric guitar.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 02:59
Geocities sucks! I am kinda currently looking for a new electric guitar. I have one already but it is a piece of crap. I was checking out Sam Ash dot com, they seem to have some pretty nice prices. I dunno I really don't need a new one, but I want one. In other news... Umm I don't know... Nothing new really. I am constantly thinking I am going to get fired. I guess I am over reacting. Who else are they going to get to work on saturday and sunday? Oh yeah, the warped tour is coming! On July 29th it'll be in Tampa at the USF soccer stadium. I am seriously thinking of going. My friends Ken and Jeff and they're respectives all wanna go."Where is my coffee?" So it's like up to me to get the tickets and stuff, I hate responsiblity. I waste too much time screwing around with this computer.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 13:18
I've been playing the lottery lately. I buy 4 tickets a week. I've come to the conclusion that winning the lottery is the only way i am going to be happy. The lack of money is keeping me from exploring the planet and discovering things that every human must discover. Take for instance if i was to meet a girl from Texas or Nepal and fall head over heels in love with her, i couldn't go see her. I'd be stuck here.... and that is what i hate. I hate being stuck in a situation, and totally unable to break free from it. Being a slave to the new world is a terrible thing. America the land of the free? I am not free, I am still bound by a unseen force. I am bound by poverty. I am not the priveleged class. I wanna win the lottery. i am going to win the lottery. I am going to win, that is the only thing that can save me from being here and now and stuck! So it has to happen right? I am going to win!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 14:08
I've met alot of people recently that are stuck in areas of life that don't concide with mine. I mean I always thought that love conquered all and everything was supposed to take a backseat to that. I never knew that there was anything more, anything different. I guess i was wrong. It seems that life and living it takes a step ahead of love. People aren't willing to make sacrifices anymore to have love. True love i still think conquers all, but maybe what I've been seeing is just a fragment of love or soething. Not quite sure I'll have to get back to you on that.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 14:04
Eureka! Scientists break speed of light
SCIENTISTS claim they have broken the ultimate speed barrier: the speed of light.
In research carried out in the United States, particle physicists have shown that light pulses can be accelerated to up to 300 times their normal velocity of 186,000 miles per second.
The implications, like the speed, are mind-boggling. On one interpretation it means that light will arrive at its destination almost before it has started its journey. In effect, it is leaping forward in time.
Exact details of the findings remain confidential because they have been submitted to Nature, the international scientific journal, for review prior to possible publication.
The work was carried out by Dr Lijun Wang, of the NEC research institute in Princeton, who transmitted a pulse of light towards a chamber filled with specially treated caesium gas.
Before the pulse had fully entered the chamber it had gone right through it and travelled a further 60ft across the laboratory. In effect it existed in two places at once, a phenomenon that Wang explains by saying it travelled 300 times faster than light.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:39
Strawberry's in my eyes
While riding the London subway a few years ago, I watched as a woman tried to keep her toddler seated by threatening to punish him if he got up again. Invariably, the tyke left his seat once again and the woman quickly yanked him back down, again threatening punishment for any further disobedience. To the surprise of probably nobody, Little Johnny bounced back out of his seat yet again the instant the woman turned her head. I was reminded of that scene while watching Darryl Strawberry's latest court appearance unfold Thursday. By some accounts, Strawberry should have been called out on strikes Thursday. Circuit Judge Florence Foster said as much last year when Strawberry violated his probation. Screw up one more time, she seemed to say, and I'll send you to the slammer. Well, guess what? She was just blowing smoke. Instead of a trip to the big house, Strawberry was sent to a substance abuse center near Ocala to continue his rehabilitation. I don't have a problem with Foster's decision because, like Foster, I believe jail would probably do the slugger more harm than good. But spare us all the tough talk, all the hollow warnings of harsher sentences for repeated violations. Empty threats don't help Strawberry overcome his addiction. "Darryl Strawberry is at bat in the bottom of the ninth with two strikes against him," Judge Foster said during Thursday's proceedings. Please tell me you're not really buying any of that. The judge spared Strawberry of jail time because that's how we treat celebrities. We give them special favor. We look at them with our hearts as much as with our heads. xr We give them second chances. (In Strawberry's case, it's third, fourth and fifth chances.) Sometimes they deserve it. Look at Chris Carter, a former drug addict turned minister. Muhammad Ali almost went to jail as a draft dodger, and he has gone on to teach valuable lessons, inspiring millions around the globe. The book on Strawberry isn't complete. "He'll be back," Tampa prosecutor Steve Wetter told Strawberry's probation officer after the hearing. Strawberry may be back. He's an addict and that's what happens with many addicts. And the judge in the case will opt for treatment over jail again while swearing on a stack of Bibles that this is absolutely, positively Strawberry's last break. The action is fine, but save the lecture. Foster did the right thing giving Strawberry another chance. He needs treatment for his affliction more than he needs time behind bars. But many addicts do. Not just ones who can drive a fastball to the opposite field. Foster supposedly spent two weeks contemplating what to do with Strawberry, visiting a Department of Corrections drug treatment center where prosecutors wanted him sent and the substance abuse center where he's going. Apparently that helped her make the right decision in this case. We all deserve that treatment. But do you really think judges typically do that for every addict who comes before them? Do you think if you or I had screwed up after being given four previous chances to get our act together that any judge would put the kind of time and effort into reaching a decision that Foster did? Please. We'd both be wearing striped jumpsuits and working on a chain gang right now. The problem isn't that Strawberry didn't go to jail. It's that you and I would have. The threats made to Strawberry would have been carried out against us. Look, judges and prosecutors are part of our society, and our society is willing to give celebrities the benefit of the doubt. It's hard for many of us to see star athletes for what they truly are, examples of the same frailties and propensity for stupidity ordinary people have. Foster went the extra mile to make sure she arrived at the right decision, but you have to wonder if she did it because of the star quality of the defendant, if his days with the Mets and Yankees kept him from wearing another kind of pinstripes. Strawberry received the celebrity treatment. We all should be so lucky.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 17:39
Things I have learned at my job doing Tech support.
1. There is always a server down somewhere
2. Things I thought were funny a month ago aren't funny anymore
3. They always call upset, admitting you have a problem is the first step.
4. I can fix only about 5% of the issues I get the rest resolve themselves.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:36
www.fark.com
posted by Paul Kenjerski 10:43
It's not my job I hate, it's the people at my job.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:27
I am beginning to wonder what in the hell I am doing. I think in the last year or so I haven't accomplished very much. Although now I have alot of stuff! What fun is stuff? I still am not happy in job or love or life. I drink too much... I am going sober though from now on, at least for a little while. I think I tend to sleep alot less and don't do dumb things when I am sober. I even see how redundantly pointless my job is, which is a bit scary. I really don't do anything important here, other than give the few people that call me a warm fuzzy feeling in there stomach. But it's all Bullshit as far as I can tell. It's almost 8 pm and soon I will being going to get some food! I think it's Chic-Fila... I am trying to be more healthy, part of the soberness thing. I even did some pushups this morning. Life is pretty pitiful. It's the decline.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 19:42
Life is sucking about now!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 17:41
I left the Tuna cans out.. and the can opener on the counter, that is how the cat got so fat!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 04:04
You know I couldn't sing that shit if i tried! well duhhh but even if I was like Pavarotti or some shit. Remembering words or anything at point of impact is where it all goes away. I forget what I was going to say and even what I was going to do. I studder and stop and eventually fall away into the nothingness that is me. But you know. i must be the fastest two fingered typer you've ever met. So fast in fact that I believe I would waste years learning the correct way to type. I am neanderthal!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 04:04
A bit of NoFx.. Just the political shit...
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:57
THE DECLINE
Where are all these stupid people from and how did they get to be so dumb Bred on purple mountain range Feed amber waves of grains To lesser human beings, zero feelings Blame it on human nature, man's destiny Blame it on the greediocracy The fear of God, the fear of change, fear of truth Add the Bill of Rights Subtract the wrongs, there's no answers Memorize and sing Star spangled songs, when the questions Aren't ever asked Is anybody learning from the past We're living in united stagnation Father what have I done. I took that 22. A gift for me from you to bed with me each night. Kept it clean polished it well. Cherished every cartridge every shell Down by the creek under brush under dirt There's a carcass of my second kill Down at the park under stone under pine There's a carcass of my brother William Brother where have you gone to I swear I never thought I could I see so many times They told me to shoot straight, don't pull The trigger squeeze, that will insure A kill, a kill is what you want To kill is why we breed The Christians love their guns the church and NRA Pray for their salvation Prey on lower faiths The story book's been read And every line believed The curriculum's been set Logic is a threat Reason searched + seized Jerry spent some Time in Michigan A 20 year vacation After all he had a dime A dime is worth a Lot more in Detroit A dime in California Just a 20 dollar fine Jerry only stayed A couple months It's hard to enjoy Yourself while Bleeding out the ass Asphyxiation is Simple and fast It beats 17 fun years Of being someone's bitch Don't think Drink your wine Watch the fire burn His problems not mine Just be that model citizen I wish I had a schilling for every senseless killing I'd buy a government. America's for sale and You can get a good deal on it and make a healthy Profit, or maybe tear it apart you start with Assumption, that a million people are smarter than 1 Serotonin's gone she gave up drifted away Sara fled though process gone She left her answering machine on The greeting left spoken sincere Messages no one will ever hear 10,000 messages a day a million more transmissions lay Dead victims of the laissez faire 10,000 voices 100 guns, 100 decibels turns to one, one bullet One empty head now with serotonin gone The man that used to speak Performs a cute routine. Feel a little patronized. Don't feel bad. They found A way inside your head And you feel a bit misled. It's not that they don't Care. The television's Put a thought inside your Head like a Barry Manilow Jingle I'd like to teach the World to sing in perfect Harmony a symphonic blank Stare. It doesn't make you care. Not designed to make you care. They're betting you wont care. They'll place a wager on your greed. A wager on your pride Why try to beat them when a million others tried We are the whore. Intellectually spayed We are the queer Dysfunctionally raised One more pill to kill the pain, One more pill to kill the pain One more pill to kill the pain, Living through conformity One more prayer should keep me safe. One more prayer to keep us safe One more prayer to keep us safe There's gonna be a better place Lost the battle lost the war lost the things Worth living for lost the will to win the fight One more pill to kill the pain The going gets tough the tough get debt Don't pay attention pay the rent our next of kins Pay for your sins a little faith should keep us safe Save us The human existence is failing Resistance essential. The future Written off. The odds are astronomically Against us only Moron and genius would fight a Losing battle against the super Ego when giving in is so damn comforting And so we go on with our lives we Know the truth but prefer lies Lies are simple. Simple is bliss. Why Go against tradition when we can Admit defeat. Live in decline. Be there Victim of our own design With status quo built on suspect. Why would anyone stick out their Neck fellow member of club We've got ours. I'd Like to introduce You to our host He's got his and I've Got mine. Meet THE DECLINE
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:45
MURDER THE GOVERNMENT
I wanna see the constitution burn Wanna watch the white house overturn Wanna witness some blue blood bleed red I wanna tar and lynch the KKK I wanna pull and shoot the NRA I wanna pay the lobbyists to kill themselves I wanna dose the DEA I wanna join the CIA (not really) It just seems so fucking easy to make this Country a better place to live. Illegalize guns and lobbying (Jail murderers and extortionists)... Legalize drugs and prostitution (Free salesmen and saleswomen)... Murder the government Murder the government Murder the government And then do it again yeah Murder the government Murder the government Murder the government and then Murder the government
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:44
A PERFECT GOVERNMENT
Even if it's easy to be free What's your definition of freedom? And who the fuck are you, anyway? Who the fuck are they? Who the fuck am I to say? What the fuck is really going on? How did the cat get so fat? Why does the family die? Do you care why? 'Cause there hasn't been a sign Of anything gettin' better in the ghetto People's fed up But when they get up You point your fuckin' finger You racist, you bigot But that's not the problem Now is it? It's all about the money Political power is takin Protecting the rich denying the poor Yeah, they love to watch the war from the White House And I wonder how can they sleep at night? How can they sleep at night? How did the cat get so fat?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:42
So today is monday, usually the worst day at work that there can ever be, but it ain't so bad right now. I haven't had a call all day, and my tummy is full of Popeyes fried chicken and mashed potatos and gravy. Myplay.com is working again so there is music. Minnie Moo's and hot tea later....Woo Hoo.. Hi Gina..
posted by Paul Kenjerski 19:00
"Tequila!"
posted by Paul Kenjerski 18:56
"Look I called over an hour ago where in the hell is my Large Pizza?"
posted by Paul Kenjerski 17:37
Today is friday at least, it's like my monday really, but it makes no never. I enjoy the weekend really. Yesterday would have been thursday. I think i may have overreacted to my cell phone breaking. I went out and bought a new one which cost me too much money, don't ask me why I bought the most expensive one they had. All I know is that I wanted it. I had to have it. Then I went to my buddys house and sat around drinking beer. Speaking of beer by the way, I have a batch of a Red Ale brewing in the spare bedrrom, now I am consumed with bottling preparations. I have about 26 bottles, and I only need about 24 more. I guess I better get drinking. I am trying to keep the bottles all the same, and that would be Heineken bottles. I have a few St. Pauli girl; bottles and a few assorted brown ones. I'll use them if neccessary. Lael was supposed to come down from Gainesville on wednesday, but I don't know what happened really.. She said she got here then could reach me. I think her phone is Bunk. Actually I know it is! She should have gotten exact directions to my house before leaving. I gave her my address last night and showed her a Mapquest map. She said she would try again. Who knows...
posted by Paul Kenjerski 17:04
and yes....I love you...
posted by Paul Kenjerski 06:04
Napster is not dead! Let the spirit live on.... I just downloaded the "Beatles 1" CD...from Napster. I thought it was closed, there is always OPENAP, or LIMEWIRE which is a defacto of Gnutella. It in itself isn't and will never be what Napster was... and still is!!! Don't be afraid of the press people. I know computer Technicians that don't use it anymore because they think they could get in trouble. Napster is like the Spice Channel... I mean if your a computer technician you shouldn't be using NAPSTER anyway.. there are FTP sites for that kinda stuff..
posted by Paul Kenjerski 05:58
I do not believe that the Beatles were geniuses in the lyrics in which they encompassed their music in. It was perhaps the actual rhythm and tone and percussion in which the did so. It was the outside envelope which consists of 3 beats really. All the popular songs have 3 beats, that repeat themselves over and over again. They vary in tempo and weight but still they remain. I guess when you find something good you tend to stick with it, but the part I don't really feel is right is that they are standard rock beats with a few minor alterations. Maybe they were the ones that created these standards. I'm not old enough to know I guess.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 05:53
Gin...if mixed well is awesome!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 05:47
All you need is love.... I always looked up to those that were happy... And wondered what spark flew up they're ass.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 05:46
Lael...doesn't that just roll off your tongue...Laay Ele....Ahhhh.... :-)
posted by Paul Kenjerski 17:02
Built new computer last wednesday. If anyone is interested
10x DVD, All in Wonder 32mb, AMD 1000mhz Thunderbird, Asus A7V, IBM Deskstar 30 GB, 256Mb PC 133 SDRAM
It cost me a little over a grand to build an almost top of the line computer. This new computer really rocks, everyone should have one. And don't ever buy a Enlight Case. They are a pain in the ass but look nice. I yanked the old 2 speed CD-Rom burner out of my old machine. Now all I have to do is get my hands on 100ft of Cat5 cable to network the 2 pc's together and share that internet!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:57
Do you ever know when something just feels so right? and you don't want it to be that perfect? It's scary huh? Maybe it is just life taking care of itself. I haven't fallen in love in a long time. In over a year in fact. I keep waiting for "love to come along and kick me in the head". As Jeff would say.
Speaking of Jeff, he's been really nice lately. And I am beginning to wonder what he wants. In other news I am planning on having a BBQ at my house sometime soon in the future. Just a small thing with food and a Hot tub.....but it's so tough being alone.. so why can't I find a girl that wants to be with me. Maybe fate will step in....hopefully...
posted by Paul Kenjerski 06:24
Tony Rich Project - Nobody knows
Thanks to janunez@newgen.net.ph for these lyrics. I pretended I'm glad you went away These four walls closing more everyday And I'm dying inside And nobody knows it but me Like a clown, I put on a show The pain is real even if nobody knows And I'm crying inside And nobody knows it but me Why didn't I say The things I needed to say How could I let my angel get away Now my world is tumbling down I can say it so clearly But you're nowhere around Chorus: The nights are lonely The days are so sad And I just keep thinking about The love that we had And I'm missing you And nobody knows it but me I carry a smile when I'm broken in two And I'm nobody without someone like you I'm trembling at night and Nobody knows it but me I lie awake it's a quarter past three I'm screaming at night as if I thought you'd hear me Yeah my heart is calling you And nobody knows it but me How blue can you get? You could ask my heart But like a jigsaw puzzle It's been torn all apart A million words couldn't say Just how I feel A million years from now you know I'll be loving you still Chorus: The nights are lonely The days are so sad And I just keep thinking about The love that we had And I'm missing you And nobody knows it but me Tomorrow morning I'm hitting The dusty road Gonna find you wherever Ever you might go I'm gonna unload my heart and hope You come back to me Said when the nights are lonely... Chorus: The nights are lonely The days are so sad And I just keep thinking about The love that we had And I'm missing you And nobody knows it but me
posted by Paul Kenjerski 02:56
My job sucks, I'm not afraid to say. They keep making stupid decisions, that affect me.. Assholes!!!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 22:36
http://members.fortunecity.com/smokinscott/whazup.html
posted by Paul Kenjerski 21:42
I should be in bed now. I am being dragged to Busch gardens by my friend Jeff tomorrow. I really don't like busch gardens at all. I don't do roller coasters. I hate walking around, but it's better than doing nothing I suppose. Did I mention I have to get up early? I amused to waking around 1 or 2 pm and then staying awake till like 4 or 5 am. This is gonna suck!
I didn't call and see about wendy today either. I am such a wuss. I am beginning to wonder if it is even really worth it. She no doubtedly has a boyfriend already. Most beautiful women do. So now I gotta ask myself "What am I going to do?" I'd love to be with her, but self doubt often strangles me. I don't want to get myself all fucked up again. What to do? what to do?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 01:41
Just a perfect day
drink Sangria in the park
And then later
when it gets dark, we go home
Just a perfect day
feed animals in the zoo
Then later
a movie, too, and then home
Oh, it's such a perfect day
I'm glad I spend it with you
Oh, such a perfect day
You just keep me hanging on
You just keep me hanging on
Just a perfect day
problems all left alone
Weekenders on our own
it's such fun
Just a perfect day
you made me forget myself
I thought I was
someone else, someone good
Oh, it's such a perfect day
I'm glad I spent it with you
Oh, such a perfect day
You just keep me hanging on
You just keep me hanging on
You're going to reap just what you sow
posted by Paul Kenjerski 02:22
This is Wendy. I am in love with wendy! But i haven't seen her in over a year. I have decided from this day on that I am hers. And I am going to show her that. Maybe someday she will recognize me for what I am, and what I feel. Wish me luck!
I love her more than anything.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 01:36
Also had another dream. Where I was a superhero. I had 2 sons. Maybe I was one of the sons. But anyways I lost my power and my eldest son decided to torture me and the youngest son. He burned us, and left us in misery as he went out in the world to have fun. Somehow when he came back he lost his powers, and while trying to torture the youngest son I overthrow him and then take my revenge. I pull out his eyes, then put them into another demension. There was this cool 3-d effect as his eyes went through some space-time portal and through like 3 dimensions. I remember one demension being like da vinci-ish. Then I bring them back and put them back in and they don't work right, and he complains. I say "whoops you wanted surgical precision?" So I pull them back out and toss them over my shoulder into the dirt. But they were just eggs and not his real eyes. Then he can see again and learns his lesson I guess. We all end up doing chinups on a high tension electric line. Wendy was there. I guess she was the mother of my 2 kids. Very peculiar dream...
posted by Paul Kenjerski 10:23
It's been over a year since I've been with Wendy, yet last night I had a dream about her. I dreamt I went looking for her, and found her in a school where I waited outside for her and surprised her as she came out of class. It was the first time I ever fell asleep in a dream. She was glad to see me, and immediately we were back together. We ended up in each others arms. I said "Don't ever leave ever again" in a crying voice as we hugged. And she said "okay". Everthing was perfect. I guess thats why they call it a dream. Wendy is the only girl I have ever really loved, and I still love her...
posted by Paul Kenjerski 10:14
Myers Rum ...Ooo La La, my drink of the moment
posted by Paul Kenjerski 22:01
Dale Earnhardt, the seven-time Winston Cup champion and one of the most beloved stars in auto racing history, died Sunday from head injuries in a last-lap crash at the Daytona 500. He was 49. Earnhardt, known as The Intimidator for his aggressive driving, had to be cut out of his car after slamming into the wall at about 180 mph on the final turn of the race while fighting for position.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 20:52
Thousands of Iraqis demonstrated in Baghdad on Sunday against Friday's air raid, which Washington and London said targeted five Iraqi radar installations in an operation to protect their planes policing no-fly zones.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 20:50
"Show of power, might of muscle, I'm the president." George W bombs Iragi radio towers!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 19:21
At work with the flu. Feeling ill. I am a trooper. I am an infector! It always has amazed me how a business or school can demand so much of my time, even when I have 102 degree temp, and feel like tossing my cookies, they'd like me to be here and be happy about it. And I've never felt quite so amused as I do when I'm at work hopped up on medicines. Everything is a blurry blur. Everyone is kind of one sided as I sit staring effortlessly at the keyboard as I type right now. Time flies by and it doesn't really matter to much, because no matter how long I have to sit here I will out of pure chemical bliss. As I stray from my point, it has always amazed me that a company would put it's workers at risks of all kinds of contagiants just to pump a little "work" out of them. Maybe it's just my company, maybe it's the corporate spunk monkeys that run the show. Anyways...
posted by Paul Kenjerski 19:18
Everybody I know got somebody but me. Am I too picky? Am i fucked up? Whats the deal?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 02:29
Note to self - (Had movie idea about Saddam and Old 70's Warren Beatty movie... you know that one where he wants to play football, and the Angel makes a mistake and takes him too early. Anyways either Saddam is taken too early and comes back in middle america and starts shit, or some peaceful guy is thrown into Saddams body, but can't speak arabic. And has to deal with the turmoil that Saddam has brought upon himself. Such as the Hiding in Palaces)
posted by Paul Kenjerski 04:14
Okay...Ever see the movie on HBO called "Teaching Peter"? It's a documentary about a little boy with downs syndrome. Peter could be confused with being retarded. In fact I'm not sure that the two things are any different. Anyways they decide to have an experiment and throw him in with other kids his age, which happens to be 3rd grade. I guess little retarded boys like to wrestle. He ends up kicking some other little boy in the head. And he is always trying to hit somebody in the head with his lunch box, or lick them or generally kick the shit out of them. The teachers do little commentary on Peters progress. But I think the teacher might be borderline retarded too. As well as Peters parents... This leads me to think that America is on the fast track downhill. I don't think kids like Peter should survive.. I'm not being mean, I just think that perhaps it'd be better for him if he wasn't put through a life living as he is. Call me sick and fucked up..whatever....
posted by Paul Kenjerski 04:10
Sometimes I think I'd be better left all alone. To starve an be hungry. Maybe to never exist. I don't care.... but I can't help but go along with what I am and what I've become. I am man, but feel like child. I am alone. I am a very ritualistic person afraid of movement in my world, and scared of changed. but yet always dreaming of thing that will make my life better. I dream of someone special to enter my life and tell me I am worth life, and love me, but I push all those that dare try away. What beast have I become?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 04:21
People are strange....
posted by Paul Kenjerski 04:12
It's one of those nights when I feel like I'm the only one awake. Even all my online buddies are in bed and fast asleep. After all it is early sunday morning. But days have no meanings to me anymore really. I sleep till I awake and then trudge to work where I sit at my desk for 8 hrs and then I am here till the morning. It's become a routine. On my days off I sleep even later and then skulk around my house till the next day. I then start it all over again. In some viscious cycle. I've become bored of the outside world, and keep to myself. People enrage me, and only make me bitter. I've discovered Jazz, and it's become what makes me move or not move for that matter. I miss life and all that i never did with it. I miss wasting it.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:01
Okay Ididn't mean to rant about my lack of cash flow, I meant to rant about SUV's and rich yupie fucks but I didn't. I guess I'm just as bad as them. But I own a Honda DAMN IT! It useless...I see that now....Where is Socialism when we need it?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 04:52
The problem with democracy
What makes us as american think we are any different that any other human being on the planet? Is it because we have capital? Is it because we have all these extravegant things? Is it because we think we are cooler? Americans are the ones destroying the planet for the most part. With money there comes greed and disallusionment. We don't even know we are doing it, but we are. Some of us have monstrous cars that expell copius amounts of toxic gases into the atmosphere, and then complain about cigarette buts in the grass. People buying things they don't really need. I know it's not always easy to not buy. But in all honesty we have become a society that feels that we must have the newest gadgets and top of the line clothing. When what we have will keep us covered and warm. Business men wear super tight neckties, and $500 dollars suits whith $200 dollar shoes. Then complain about the Jinco's they're son just bought. Can't they see it's all the same? I do not understand, what we have become. "My car is bigger", "How dare you pass me, Vrrrrooooom" and we see the poor people and cast fear and hate upon them, but maybe they are free-er than you and I. They have not the same worries as we do. I've noticed that the more money I make, the more I spend. To keep myself fit within my class, Just to survive now it takes me almost everything I make.
My job is my source of income, my soul source of income. And I make $10.50 per hour. That is roughly $1290 a month. Minus $200 for the car leaves $1090, Insurance being a young single male costs me another $200, now we are down to $890. I drive 50 miles a day and fill my car up 7 times a month costing me $140. That leaves me with $750. And I have a student loan that is $100 and food which is $5 a day dor a grand total of $250 a month. That takes me down to $500 a month. So now my cell, burdines for work clothes bill, and miscellaneous credit cards is about another $100. So I got $400 left over. And it seems there are always unexpected expenses like changing the oil in my car, and going out to eat, drinking, Movie rentals, and coffee at 7-11, so monthly I'd add that up to about $400 dollars. So that leaves me with nothing. How did I ever survive before I had this job? I have no idea. I am at a loss of words.
I guess what I am really trying to say is, I don't want to work anymore. I don't see the purpose in working. If I din't work I wouldn't need a cell phone, car, business clothes, all I would really need is food. but now I've gotten here and I can't regress. It's all lost and that in itslef is the problem with the american system. It only gives you what you need and not what you want.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 04:50
I'm at work... I'm bored... I'm cold... I'm hungry... I need a beer... Where have all my pens gone?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:57
I know, I know, I fucking know. It's been about forever since I updated this page. I've been a busy boy though. Actually I've acomplished a whole lot of nothing in the past month or so, but it's all good. I've been working lately and going out on alot of dates. I've met alot of really weird people, and a few cool ones. I think I might write a book about internet dating, I mean I am the master. I've met girls and within a 1/2 an hour been out on a date with them. I feel though that I'll never find exactly what I'm looking for, because in all truth I'm not sure myself what I'm looking for. i thought I just wanted to meet a nice girl and settle down and start a average life with kids and all that stuff, but the more I think about it and the more girls I meet, the less I want Just average. Lets face it average is boring! I want excitement, and a real fire to just burn me! And I haven't found that yet. I also need more than average beauty. I once was in awe of an average girl, that had great charm and bright personality. But that didn't get me too far. I want to look at someone and everyday be in awe of them. I think Wendy made me this way, because I truly think she was beautiful. If she hadn't left me, and ran off. Then I'd think I would still be with her. She had a really great personality, and a charming face...and we understood each other. She knew when I was upset and what I was thinking, and I truly believe that scared her away. It was too perfect. But anyways.... I think I'm just going to be single for a while. And let nature take it's course.
In other news my Job still blows! I will begin looking for something else hopefully soon. I want to see what I can do in the day trading market also. I have a friend that is quite knowledgeable about it, and I've been trying to leech all the info I can from him. I always meet the oddballs and this guy is no exception. But brilliance always comes in an unmistakable different form. I did my budget last week. It seems that with bills and other expendatures I'll have an extra 260 a month left over for going out money. This I feel is just not enough. I didn't even add the money I would like to be putting away into savings, computer upgrades, beer, and other fun shit! So hopefully I'll get off my ass and get a looking for a new job!
Actually I don't have much fun anymore, the only real fun I can recognize is playing my drums. I love my drums. Even though I don't jam on them as much as I should. I do a little bit everyday or almost, but still I'm not sounding the way I'd like too. I know my neighbors have to be sick of them already, but I gotta keep it up. I mean it's the only real fun I have! I do ocassionally have fun when I'm out and about. Like tonite when me and a girl went out to Hopps. She is a bit loud and it was refreshing to see someone that was totally at home in their skin. I wish I was more myself. I just love a girl that can use the word "fuck".
We'll thats all I can really say right about now. I had a good holiday season this year. New years was better though. I was with friends and it made all the difference. Christmas kinda sucked. I spent all day putting together a damn computer desk, and wanting someone to call me, but she was a ditz and I can see that now! Hopefully I'll update this thing a bit more frequently. Till next time, Adios.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 02:30
Scenario: I buy a little plant for my desk, that resembles a Bonzai. It was my thing.... to have a little greenery in my cubicle. Then today while walking through the office I see someone else has one too! How gay can someone be, as too copy me. And of all people it's someone I don't like. So what should I do? will I poison it? Will I trash it? Will I just let it be? Or do I just buy more plants. I think I'll just buy more. My cubicle will be a jungle. With Tigers and apes and everything. I wonder if I'll get in trouble for put a snake on my desk?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 17:29
Rules and regulations... Code of conduct... Moral self worth... I can't believe the beautiful world has come to this. Property, and you can't use mine. Don't even look at it..it's mine. Get real nothing is yours you don't own anything. It owns you. The things you own, the things you think you own...they own you. Rules differ from state to state, and country to country... In Afghanistan women can lose they're lips for wearing makeup under they're vail, and they're not aloud to learn. What kinda system is this? In the middle east people can lose limbs for stealing... again what kind of system is this. Having any code of conduct is restricting to someone at some point. It may be good for the masses, but not the minority. And of course there are always exceptions... Having a morale dilema? Don't worry....Sure it's nice to have a $500,000 house and a $30,000 car, but then you have to protect it. Buy guns and security systems..and maybe a guard with a taser. All while staying from the remoteness of your home to afraid to go outside, because "they" might see you. This is a simple lesson I'm teaching here really. If it has no use, there is no need. If it requires more input then output, it's no efficient. If it causes stress and worry, then it'll make you loose time....only the effectively efficent people live to be 120 and happy.
I feel extreme distaste for yuppies...Wallow in your extravagencies..
posted by Paul Kenjerski 18:56
THE ORIGINAL "Crash and Burn" 1893 Drew Street Clearwater, FL 33765 (727) 449-BURN . . . . .. Could it get anymore fucking cooler!!!!!!!! Piss off !!!!!!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 01:03
As a young guy I always wante to be Black....I always wanted to be special. Now as an adult I can see that they had many things to overcome. I'm not glad I was white by any means. White is normal...why would I wanna be normal? Black has a difference that scares some people and makes difference. I look upward to those people. Just because they are different than I. I can't ever be as cool as Shaft....or maybe can I? . . . . . . .. . . . . . .. . . .
posted by Paul Kenjerski 01:01
I drank a whole bottle of wine tonite.. It was an 98'. Extremely fine and it mixed well with the two beers I had following it. Wine I have found is a great medium between beer and sobriety. I'm not saying I didn't get a buzz, but it was a romantic buzz... Okay now the one song I found good on the new Lenny Kravitz Cd was Track 7...Mr. Cabdriver...I guess.. but it was cool... It had a 70's groove to it, while maintaining Lenny's distaste for society. I truly respectable song from any punks view...
posted by Paul Kenjerski 00:58
I must give it up to Lenny.... I never thought he'd release a greatest hits album. I bought it by the way... I do still buy CD's ..I think he deserves to have his CD bought. I enjoy every song on it..It's a good CD.. I give it an A++. especialally if you like that slow melodic 70's sound that he eminates... I like the nes "again" song...I think it's a really good song actually. It has feeling..which is not normal in the industry now...I see lenny as becoming.."Historic".
posted by Paul Kenjerski 00:53
Robert Morton Downey, Jr... Hmmm what can I say? Does he have a drug problem? yeah... Does he act stupidly? yeah..... I think that this emphasises my whole idea about drugs. If people want drugs they''l get em...He "as in robert" has the afliciction of being a celebrity. If he was a normal person...this wouldn't be a problem.. of course he'd be dead.... I think the whole the whole idea about drugs needs to be be refinanced..that meaning...peole get high on other stuff that is sold at places you and I go to everyday.. The whole "War against drugs is doomed". If you can't see that then your blind. Huffers and whippets..think about it.. Does the sale of whipped cream need to be restricted? I ahve personally bought 5 cans of whipped cream and been acused of "Needing to get a life", but so what...i know I need a life.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 00:49
I am getting better at drumming. I totally have the first little exercise down I was supposed to learn, now it's time to move onto lesson two. As for the Trumpet, I just don't have what it takes I think. My lungs are straining for air after the first 10 seconds.... so I truly believe there is no hope..
posted by Paul Kenjerski 17:54
In other news.. Bush is our new president after much debate and calamity. I miss the party of the year last friday..and it's perfectly fine. I was thinking about going for about a second...but had decided not too, and it was for the best I think. I bought a little bonzai looking plant for my cubicle today.It's nice, and I hope it the best. Things go well for me recently. I had an exceellent Thanksgiving. My aunt, Uncle, and cousin came down from Va... which made it feel like a real Thanksgiving. I may go up there for Christmas...depends on if I can get the time off. I will try, but it doesn't look good I must say. I miss being close to family during the Holiday season... It's always better with more people around.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 17:52
This next thing I am about to say carries much weight. I met someone the other day, who said they were from Russia. At first I was in disbelief. Her name was Anastasia. She was a journalist in Saint Petersburg. Now being an avid chatter, I have come across fakes and other frauds in the past, and I was beginning to believe she was one. I don't know why I really had no proof. just an inkling of doubt. Maybe it was her excellent use of english, or her knowledge of america. Anyways I was quite abrupt with her and Apologize for it. I should I guess speak with only people I know, but that wouldn't be any fun. I got an e-mail from her shortly after saying she was hurt, and that I should take feelings into account before I start making wild accusations. I know this is true.. I feel bad for making someone so far away feel like crap. And now there is nothing I can do, because the damage is done. So if you read this Anastasia... I am sorry
posted by Paul Kenjerski 17:46
Every year she makes Pecan pie, and say have a slice. You'd think one of these days she'd get the hint that I hate Pecan Pie...
posted by Paul Kenjerski 18:09
So did everyone have a good Thanksgiving? I did...I had the most great dinner, thanx Aunt Judy and mom.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 18:08
I really should watch my mouth....I'm sorry.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 05:07
If you see this guy punch him in the head for me.
Aren't drinking games fun? ? ? Ha fucking Ha... Little Bitch...
posted by Paul Kenjerski 05:00
A mosquito bit me right in the middle of my chest. Now it's all itchy... Damn my luck. I guess I should quite laying in the bfrontyard with no shirt...just kidding I really have no idea how he got me. Musta been a sniper or something
posted by Paul Kenjerski 10:46
Work is an odd word. Kind of evil in itself. Work..... is a bad word. At least by todays standards. I always try to get out of work. I mean unless I'm getting paid. Then work is fine. I don't even work enough to wash my own car, so why should I work for the man. I truly think the american work ethic has truly went downhill in the last decade. I have friends that break they're back in menial jobs to make a living. And what for? Just barely to survive? Is this enough? If I worked 40 hr's a week and made just barely enough to get by then I would be 1 pissed off boy. Luckily I still live at home and have little expenses. I ahve a car payment and insurance, and what little debt I have accumulated...and this is still aburden upon me, until I step back and realize that this is why I work....not for luxury but the bare neccessities...and this would be fine if I had a filling inside my heart. Where is my cream filling? My Jelly torrete? It all matters what is on the inside...and right now there is nothing except my job and what I was born with. I'm like an empty donut waiting to get filled!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:06
Sometimes I like to sleep till noon
Sometimes..I think I'd be better all alone
And I don't need anyone too tell me what I should or should not do
because I already don't care
And it's not my fault
Because I don't give a fuck
to what you say or do
Or even who you screw
Because I've given it up...
I wanna puke and it all not my fault
You make me sick with your political bantor
And don't care quite care for your face
Without a trace I wish you would all but dis-sa-ppear
and I sit and seek what isn't quite clear
so now you know what kinda dork I am
So now you say I always knew it anyway
Punk song for MTV .....
posted by Paul Kenjerski 02:58
Why is fast food service so fucked? I went to Wendy's today, and had a simple order. First I wanted something on the menu they no longer had (a special) then I wanted 2 .99 sandwiches and one .99 coke. Then he said 2.13 was my total. I know this wasn't right, but he just forgot the coke I'd tell him at the window. When I get to the window he want's 4.75...WTF.. So experimenting I gave it to him, and pull ahead. I get tto the second window and get a huge bag of food. 2 sandwiches and two fries. I still wanted a drink though, so I asked "Where is my coke?" I was then asked for $1.06 more..no problem. Then I get my drink and leave. So I've spent 6 bucks now on some shit I never ordered in the first place. Wouldn't this piss you off? I think the people that work there just don't care, and honestly I don't blame them too much. They get paid shitty money and work serving assholes like me all day. So in conclusion...Wendy's should just raise there pay level. I'd be willing to pay a little more for some decent service.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:06
I have a new boss his name is Charles. I'll miss Bruce. I hope this doesn't change Sunday (TV day). I newer things. I met a girl that works at Burdines...she's like a 10. I can't believe she gave me her number. Silly girl! I have simple but to get out more, I think it's all about the outside. I have relatives coming for Thanksgiving, but I will not be home then..I regret to say my job is my main focus right now... I am also planning on winning the lotto. I have done some research and I believe greatly increased my odds.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 02:55
Here's a site for all the guys...it offers a few helpful tips when it comes to the ladies. Some of them are kinda dumb, but so are most guys. Put the mouse here and click!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 02:50
This from MSNBC "after 2 a.m., when the major news outlets, including NBC News, MSNBC Cable and MSNBC.com, declared that Florida’s 25 electoral votes had put Bush over the top. For more than an hour and a half, Bush’s supporters celebrated in Austin, Texas, while Gore’s consoled one another in the rain in Nashville, Tenn. Then, at 4 a.m. ET, the news outlets retracted their projections that Bush had won, setting off wild celebrations in Tennessee. Shortly beforehand, Gore called Bush in Austin to withdraw the congratulations he had telephoned to the governor earlier. Bush communications director Karen Hughes said Bush found Gore’s behavior “unbelievable.” Across the country, several newspapers stopped their presses to adjust front pages to reflect the sudden changes."
Ha Ha...What a dick!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 12:19
And the Anti-Christ will have support from his father. He will arise from the ashes of a bright shining star and destroy all that is material. Bush has won! WTF Can you imbeciles not see that he was the chosen one. He is the AntiChrist. The master was right and the end is near. The third and final war is upon approach, and there is not a thing you or I can do about it. Except Take warning...!!!!
Until the end I am here.
727-542-3404
posted by Paul Kenjerski 02:59
I'm home and have been for a few hours. I've moved my bed out from the wall, it looks more like a bedroom now, i think. It left the entire rest of my room in a scatter though. I think I need to get off my lazy ass and finish cleaning it. I think I want to paint it too though. It's always a pestering thing I get into doing. I want to do it, but then when I start I realize it is work and then become devoid of any motivation....and so it sits dormant half done till I am inspired again.I was thinking of a grayish blue sea color..with darker shades in select areas. Each wall being a different color natural. Too much of the same shade would make me mad. First I have to be inspired like I am now. And tomorrow I think I will loose all my inspiration. I also need some type of desk/contraption to store my computer/entertainment center onto. I think I will have too build something of My own to fulfill my needs. I am one of those people that decides....If I am going to do something then it should be done in greatness...but the only problem with this is...It is seldom ever finished. As with painting my walls..
posted by Paul Kenjerski 04:37
I'm here at work now, it's monday, but it's like my friday...so it's all good. We won the lottery last week at work. 4 out of 6 numbers. that's $79.50. We decided to reinvest the money back into more lottery tickets..So now it's all gone..We lost. So it appears I'll be working for one more week at least. In other news if you like funny pictures and other things check this site out. I have three days off this week, and I have no plans other than sit around the house. I may wash my car... but even that seems to be pushing my lazyiness to a new all time low. I was thinking about upgrading my PC soon. The cost of parts and things are at a all time low. If you want to build your own PC and are looking for cheap parts check here. They seem to have the lowdown on just about everything. I'll be sleeping till 2 p.m. on my days off so don't call me before then. If you would like to say Hi, then call my cell phone and leave a harasing message. The number is 727-542-3404. I probably won't answer... but it's the thought that counts.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 18:50
I am alone and I understand why...
I fear the look in the eyes....of what she may see.
A crack in my defense any weakness in my wall
I conclude it will have to be her
Or I'll be alone forever.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 04:36
I fear....
I fear rejection
I fear interception.
I fear failure....and I can't explain it but
I fear I'll succeed.
I fear growth
I fear aging
I am scared of myself and what I might do
posted by Paul Kenjerski 04:35
Why is it almost 5 am and I'm still awake? I have to work tomorrow brain ...let me sleep please
posted by Paul Kenjerski 04:33
If your interested this is where I do most of my eating... and complaining about TPS reports...
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:47
It's amazing that I forgot how good this CD was. I suggest going out this week and buying "Soungarden Superunknown". It's an amazing collection of music really. It may be one of my favorites. Not for the more popular songs which everyone knows, but for the slow and experimental ones that I like the best. I like 6,10,12,13,14, an 15. I give it like a bunch of stars and a few thumbs up!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:30
4th Of July
Shower in the dark day
Clean sparks diving down
Cool in the waterway
Where the baptized drown
Naked in the cold sun
Breathing life like fire
Thought I was the only one
But that was just a lie
Cause I heard it in the wind
And I saw it in the sky
And I thought it was the end
And I thought it was the 4th of July
Pale in the flare light
The scared light cracks & disappears
And leads the scorched ones here
And everywhere no one cares
The fire is spreading
And no one wants to speak about it
Down in the hole
Jesus tries to crack a smile
Beneath another shovel load
And I heard it in the wind
And I saw it in the sky
And I thought it was the end
And I thought it was the 4th of July
Now I'm in control
Now I'm in the fall out
Once asleep but now I stand
And I still remember
Your sweet everything
Light a Roman candle
And hold it in your hand
Cause I heard it in the wind
And I saw it in the sky
And I thought it was the end
And I thought it was the 4th of July
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:25
Head Down
We see you laugh
We see you dance
We take that away
Every day
We see you cry
We turn your hear
Then we slap your face
We see you try
We see you fail
Some things never change
We hear you cry
We hear you wail
We steal that smile from your face
Bow down to live
Your Life
Head down, hide that smile
Head high got to smile
Head high like a song you like
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:21
I am lonely... Tomorrow morning I will be helping Ken and Amy move some of thier crap to their new house. Seeing them together and happy makes me glad they found each other. It does make me feel alone though. Ken has Amy, and Jackie is cursed with Jeff. I think all I need to do is find a name that goes good with mine and look through the phone book. Paul and Wendy was nice....Don't you think? Ahhh Well that wasn't meant to be, but it was fun while it lasted. So I think maybe Paul and Michelle, only because I don't know any Michelles, or Paul and Dawn...I guess right now I'll have to settle for Paul and Killians...
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:16
Why is my company so cheap? Why do they always do the wrong thing? Not that they are going downhill, but they put the plants on the rows of cubicles the farthest away from me. I like plants. I need some type of greenery to make me feel less trapped inside this dungeon.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 02:52
I say.....Vote for "none of the above". Make it your choice not to choose. If I don't choose what do I loose? So far the only thing I've been told I'll loose is my right to bitch about who got elected. Is this right? No..I'm still going to bitch. I think I could do it better, and I'm an idiot. Not that I want the job..oh no. My life will not be so conviluted with the business of a politician. The grasshoppers life for me. Dance and play, Dance and play..all summer long. While Mr Ant works works works. So Vote for "none of the above".
posted by Paul Kenjerski 09:10
It appears to me that Geoerge W Bush was maybe....perhaps boozing it up and doping it up, and hiding in college to avoid going to Vietnam..maybe I'm not sure. With his fathers phat pocket this could and I think was done. Now Gore...with no rich father, had to go... and he came back and made something out of himself. I think....and this is what I think. I'm not looking down on Bush for having a DUI. I understand it was the past, but I also feel that his past overshadows the now. In this case, I can look at Duhbya and see that he is just a weasle. I think if I were going to vote, I'd vote for Nader.... Even though he lacks flavor and color...living in a black and white world surrounded by grayness. I think he is one of the best examples of democracy left around. I'm not sure if being a career politician is a good or bad thing. I think it takes a special person, to live off of society, and your only duty should be to help and raise that society to a steady and prosperous level. To be a servant of the masses. To give up all color and free expression and to be societies slave.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 09:00
THIS IS YOUR LIFE
And you open the door and step inside
We're inside our hearts
Now imagine your pain as a white ball of healing light
That's right your pain
Your pain itself is a white ball of healing light.
I don't think so.
This is your life, good to the last drop, It doesn't get any better than this
This is your life and it's ending one minute at a time.
This isn't a seminar.
This isn't a weekend retreat.
Where you are now you can't even imagine what the bottom is like.
Only after disaster can we be resurrected
It's only after you've lost everything are you free to do anything.
Nothing is static
Everything is a fallen, everything is falling apart.
This is your life it doesn't get any better than this
This is your life and it's ending one minute at a time.
You are not a beautiful and unique snowflake.
You are the same decaying matter as everything else.
We are all part of the same compost heap
We are the all singing all dancing crap of the world.
You are not your bank account
You are not the close you wear
You are not the contents of your wallet.
You are not your bowel cancer
You are not your Grande latte.
You are not the car you drive
You are not your fucking Khaki's.
You have to give up You have to give up
You have to realize that someday you will die.
Until you know that you are useless
I say never let me be complete
I say let me never be contentv
I say deliver me from Swedish furniture.
I say deliver me from clever art.
I say deliver me from clear skin and perfect teeth.
I say you have to give up.
I say Evolve, let the chips fall where they may.
This is your life, It doesn't get any better than this.
This is your life, and it's ending one minute at a time.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 01:08
Sometimes I think there’s nobody I can trust
I think that all the love I’ve ever lost has been lust
When Everything I know falls apart at the seams
And I’ve lost sight of my fragile but dear dreams
I run crying away like a child and hide in some stupid place
Everything inside becomes blurred and not quite right
Then my heart feels like someone came and took a bite
I cease to function, I lie awake but dead in my sheets
And still my stupid heart continues to waste its beats
I’m alive in my head, but I know … I’d be better of dead
posted by Paul Kenjerski 01:04
Desperately Seeking a Mate
By Stephen Gregory
WebMD Medical News
March 20, 2000 (Los Angeles) -- Meaghan Muir wants a life partner. But the 28-year-old Santa Barbara woman has decided to take a breather after a failed 3-1/2-year relationship. At one point, the couple talked seriously about spending the rest of their lives together. But not now. "There were differences between us," Muir says. "And I don't know if we weren't able to work through them or if we just didn't put enough effort into getting past them. When I'm being practical about it, I say to myself it never would have worked out, but sometimes I think, 'Did I really explore it? Did I really get into it?' "
Singles Seeking Singles
Muir is one of millions of single adults reflecting on their efforts to find true love. They want it, but they also know that it's harder and harder to find. And those who think they've found it are often mistaken. The rate of marriage is down; the rate of divorce, up. The number of marriages for every 1,000 women dropped 43% between 1960 and 1996, while the rate of divorce more than doubled in the same time period, according to a report published last year by the National Marriage Project, a research and education initiative at Rutgers University in New Jersey. And the news on cohabitation isn't much different. In a study scheduled to appear in this summer's Annual Review of Sociology, Pamela Smock, PhD, a researcher at the University of Michigan's Institute for Social Research, finds that five out of six cohabiting couples end that living arrangement within three years, with only 30% of them legalizing their unions with marriage. The majority of cohabiting couples simply break up.
Retreating for Self-Protection
What gives? Some experts suggest that our longer life expectancy and society's growing acceptance of divorce mean that many singles (or once-again singles) feel no pressure to tie the knot sooner rather than later. But one expert has another view. Many singles are emotionally rudderless in relationships because they subconsciously retreat from truly loving and being loved, seeing the emotional risks involved as too great, says Robert Firestone, PhD, a Santa Barbara psychologist. They slip into a self-protective retreat mode for fear of getting emotionally wounded. In his book Fear of Intimacy, published in 1999 by the American Psychological Association, Firestone theorizes that exploring true intimacy is often anathema to the self-protective mechanism people have used since childhood to guard against emotional pain. Although many people enter relationships with the best of intentions, they often have difficulty getting past these self-protective walls, he says. As a result, they fail to achieve lasting love and intimacy with their partners.
The Solutions
Firestone encourages intimacy-phobes to seek counseling and to become their own emotional trainers. By urging themselves to take risks and bare their vulnerable side, they may be able to establish a true connection with their partners. "Defenses shut out emotional experiences and cut off feeling," Firestone says. "Move toward openness and honesty and directness and take your chances." Two other often-cited pieces of advice are as obvious as they are ignored: Talk to long-term couples about how they were able to achieve a meaningful, long-lasting relationship. And learn basic relationship skills, such as how to handle disagreements basic. Too many couples believe that if they find themselves disagreeing, they haven't found true love. ''Of course they're going to have disagreements,'' says Diane Sollee, director of the Washington, D.C.-based Coalition for Marriage, Family, and Couples' Education, which represents a nationwide network of courses in building relationship skills. ''They just need to know how to handle them. You have to learn to understand and respect your partner's position even if you don't agree with it.'' Fear of intimacy, experts concede, usually can't be overcome quickly. But for singles hoping to become part of a couple, relationship skills definitely can be honed. Stephen Gregory has been a journalist for 10 years and has worked for such publications as the Los Angeles Times, the San Diego Union-Tribune, and U.S. News and World Report.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 00:56
so do I give up?
do I let them invade?
do I become one of them?
bugs
bugs in my head
bugs in my bed
bugs till I'm dead
posted by Paul Kenjerski 00:53
I heard you on the wireless back in Fifty Two
Lying awake intent at tuning in on you.
If I was young it didn't stop you coming through.
Oh-a oh
They took the credit for your second symphony.
Rewritten by machine and new technology,
and now I understand the problems you can see.
Oh-a oh
I met your children
Oh-a oh
What did you tell them?
Video killed the radio star.
Video killed the radio star.
Pictures came and broke your heart.
Oh-a-a-a oh
And now we meet in an abandoned studio.
We hear the playback and it seems so long ago.
And you remember the jingles used to go.
Oh-a oh
You were the first one.
Oh-a oh
You were the last one.
Video killed the radio star.
Video killed the radio star.
In my mind and in my car, we can't rewind we've gone to far
Oh-a-aho oh,
Oh-a-aho oh
Video killed the radio star.
Video killed the radio star.
In my mind and in my car, we can't rewind we've gone to far.
Pictures came and broke your heart, put the blame on VTR.
You are a radio star.
You are a radio star.
Video killed the radio star.
Video killed the radio star.
Video killed the radio star.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 18:16
Start your own business.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 18:37
Damn and I thought I might have been obsessed. Does this make me a pervert, if I think she's hot?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 06:15
My how they grow up.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 06:04
Curry
posted by Paul Kenjerski 04:07
It took me a while but I found it again. Stinky Meat
posted by Paul Kenjerski 04:00
Come on baby, "Lets get it on!"
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:59
Now I know why that couch was broke!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:58
Do you miss your Childhood? I miss the transformers
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:56
Funny named Molecules I think my favorite is Cummingtonite.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:55
I need a pillow!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:36
I'm going to bring my camera in tomorrow and take a few pics. All undercover of course so stay tuned. Can you tell I'm so excited.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 01:38
So here I am at my new work enviroment. I have an awesome cubicle now. Aren't you so jealous? This network is so fast. It even makes my road runner look like a Hunk-A Junk. I am like the first one online here too, I'm so excited! Not really, I'll be here till 8 AM by myself, while the movers and network people scurry about making sure everthing works. But seriously now. This new complex makes the other building look like shit. The bathrooms are immaculate. It has wide open floor spaces, and a snack room that would make 7-11 jealous. I'm lovin it.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 01:37
Electrosex
posted by Paul Kenjerski 04:52
Caffeine Central.....I never knew..
posted by Paul Kenjerski 04:49
A most interesting site maintained by Zannah.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 04:37
I think I want a stand-up bass.... just to lure Ken over here and pick his brain about musical things...I am at loss for so much. Why don't I have talent? I was reading a bio of Charles Mingus... He was really a cool guy I guess...I was said by him "All my talent playing the bass is because of years of practice, but my composing skills were a gift from god". I believe most people are not like me....As I am completely talentless... I mean..Look at my webpage as compared to others. I couldn't tell you shit about Java, while thousands of others could.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 04:35
So I underestimated playing the drums. It's hard to go fast. I can't even figure out how to get my foot organized with my right arm. Then the left arm won't go...so why is my right arm stopping when I tell the left arm to hit the snare? Should my foot want to take off with the right arm? And why do both arms get confused about orders I gave the left leg? I'm sure this is a minor set back right? I mean it is my body, and I can control it. It just takes practice. Did I mention I wore the logo right off my sticks within the first 2 hours? I think if I keep practicing about 5 hours a day, I'll have something down in about a month or two.....maybe hopefully...Did I mention I bought a trumpet?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 04:30
Buck will fuck you up...but seriously...fuck buck
posted by Paul Kenjerski 04:25
I am so sick of hearing "Did you know Al gore invented the internet?". Lets get a few things straight. He never said that! And I'd like to explain to you what exactly happened, and how this thing came into being.First things first though....Research...Click here and you'll see a history of the internet.
So you've just learned alot? Now you understand where the internet has grown from... Okay on with the rolling stone interview... or part of it.
What did you actually have to do with the creation of the Internet?
In my first term in Congress - I was elected in 1976 - I began a series of meetings, under the rubric of a group called the Congressional Clearinghouse on the Future, between interested members of Congress and computer scientists, geneticists, futurists and others. It became apparent that the juice was in the information revolution. Computer-processing power was doubling every year and a half, but the transmission lines for information were still based on twisted copper. The number of bits per second was static, and it wasn't increasing; meanwhile, processing power was expanding geometrically, logarithmically, explosively.
That had particular significance for me, because, when I was ten, my father, who was the author of the Interstate Highway bill, often took me to the meetings of his committee that designed the interstate-highway system. And he often explained why it was such a major project for him. Our family used to drive back and forth, six or seven times a year, between Carthage, Tennessee, and Washington, D.C., on two-lane roads. I remember going from Carthage to Nashville at nighttime, on old Highway 70, and seeing a long line of red taillights stretching out for miles and miles and miles.
Years later, that analogy jumped out at me. Just as the proliferation of cars and trucks after World War II made the two-lane roads obsolete, the proliferation of personal computers and the growth of processing power - in the wake of the Apollo program - made the old two-lane information pathways obsolete. At least, prospectively obsolete. And in short order.
Did you imagine back then that there'd one day be a consumer use for the Internet?
Oh, yes. And I began evangelizing the idea of an information superhighway. There were a lot of others who did the work, who came up with the discoveries. And I never said I invented the Internet. But where the congressional role was concerned, I did take the lead. And I went beyond having hearings - I introduced legislation. I pushed big increases in the funding for research into how to expand the capacity of fiber-optic cable, how to develop supercomputers that were more powerful, how to develop the right switches and algorithms to handle the information flow. I went to talk with people who had the early networks - like DARPAnet, which was a tiny little Defense Department network on which the first e-messaging - they didn't have the term e-mail yet - was taking place.
I wrote a piece of legislation to establish something called NREN: the National Research Education Network. The idea behind it was to create large supercomputing centers, which didn't exist then - research centers that had leading-edge computer capacity - and then to link them with high-volume data links as a demonstration project to show what could happen.
In doing this, I went back and studied Congress' role in the development of the telegraph. Do you know the story of Samuel Morse? He was a portrait painter, and he was painting a portrait in the White House of President Franklin Pierce. And his wife, back in Virginia - later to be West Virginia - fell ill and, over a two-week period, died. The word did not get to him, because it had to come by horseback. Had he known, he would have been by his wife's side. He was consumed with guilt, as well as grief, and he thought, as an artist, "What could I do to make sure that nobody else feels this pain that I feel?" And he invented the telegraph. Anyway, the government's role was to build this demonstration line between Washington and Baltimore.
The NREN was a demonstration of what could be done. I always felt that once the capacity was demonstrated, it would grow out from the backbone, as other people wanted it. I also introduced the Super Computer Network Study Act, which created the laboratory where Marc Andreeson developed the first graphic Web browser. Most people didn't see the sense in this, because they had no experience with what the transmission of computerized data meant. I met with the last chairman of AT&T before it was dismantled - a guy named Charles Brown - and I tried to sell him on the idea of a project to vastly expand the information networks to handle this new computing. Mr. Brown had zero interest in this. More to the point, he had negative interest.
.....So as you can see he didn't invent the internet, but has been a supporter since the beginning. I hope this clears a few things up.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:54
I set up this awesome Java script to redirect you from the crappy geocities site, to my new fresh fortunecity site....thinking of you readers..Paul
posted by Paul Kenjerski 01:56
I have moved to a new site that actually works...but if your here your reading this...so you already know...
posted by Paul Kenjerski 01:32
Did I mention....you should go out and buy Minor Threat - Complete discography. just because it is some really fast intellectual shit. I suggest drinking and listening...it tends to slow down alot of the things I seemed to miss the first hundred times or so. I thank you Ken...(Ken introduced me to Punk music and Minor threat) I owe you...
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:59
English is an awesome thing... It's supposedly one of the hardest languages to learn, and I totally believe them. I learn new things about it everyday. I love expressing myself.....I think the great "Hurricane" said that writing was a weapon.. I'm not sure, something like that, but you know what...If using other weapons is this damn exciting or at least refreshing and spiritual than bring on the guns.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:56
Selling out got me this really nice car, did I mention that?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:52
"It's quite normal to realize that, on many days, a career is a job rather than a heart-pounding adventure." Well fuck that, I want to live life to the fullest. I want it all, and I want it right fucking now! I have become sort of a corporate slave to things. I mean I go to work, and I don't have many friends left. I have a car payment and all those things I swear I'd never do, I've done. I've sold out as everyone does. Everyone is a wide concept I suppose. I mean it does mean everyone right?! So why shouldn't I be able to have a ob that inspires me? Why should I be stuck in the same ole same ole? I am going to buy a few things tomorrow... A bike to ride....I wanna go fast, plus I've noticed I've gained a few pounds on my abs since this selling out phase, and I do have the pinellas trail directly behind my house. Why not put it to use? And my other purchase will be a drum set, so watch the fuck out Bob! Not that I am any good at drumming, but I need to release some agravation....This world pisses me off..I expect my drumming to be alot like a minor threat song...Really fucking fast. I always liked to ride my bike as a young youth, so maybe I can catch some of that antiadulthood and swallow it down.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:51
As if anyone can read this. My website is kinda screwed up right now. It's not my fault I don't think, geocities has just the crappiest support staff. Get your shit together guys... I mean come on. Do I have to come down there and flex some expertise?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:20
Todat I must wish a farewell to the Bottle Rocket. It was sold bright and early this morning for $1200. I will remember all the fun times we had. I remember all the places we went, and the things we saw. I wish you the best of luck in your future. Goddbye...and fare the well.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:13
This weeks music pick.... Charles Mingus - Haitian Fight Song
posted by Paul Kenjerski 12:03
Last night was the last night for the boys at 3700 38th Ave. N. The house is now vacant. A whole era that streched through the 90's till yesterday is gone. It was on it's last legs anyway, but now it is gone. We did it out with it's due respects. We had a fire, and drank beer. We burned books like Nazi's. It was a good ole time. Goodbye old house at 3700. We shall miss you and the times we had.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 11:55
The car is mine!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 11:48
My new car....if all goes well at the bank!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 21:05
I added a few new pics to my section. What can I say, I got bored at 4 a.m. and wanted to show someone my freshly shaved head. I like it, I don't care if you do or not, but I do! So what am I supposed to do about a new car? Do I get payments and byte the bullet or, do I search for a person with another piece of shit. I would like a new car, but I'll take what I can get. I don't care anymore to tell the truth. If my truck ran well. then I'd drive it. I fear it's something expensive. I've been drinking. Can you tell?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:30
Speaking of Bob... I dug out the cd he gave me a while ago. The more I listen to it the better it gets. I used not to like the one dudes voice but it's getting better. I guess it was the same with the last RANCID cd. I took some listening to get to jive. I was thinking of getting some drums...I was also thinking of doing some daytrading....but I need the money elsewhere...like invested in a car. I saw a 1971 Porsche 914 in the paper for $1400. I had looked up a pic on the internet and it was disagreeable. I suppose parts for the beast would cost a arm & Leg too. Does anyone else wish they'd hurry up and get that teleportation thing working? Beam me up Scotty!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 20:22
Bob - " My e-mail address is kenjerski@yahoo.com. I can't remember what your e-mail was. I had it here at work on my computer, but some dumbass wiped it and cleaned all my shit out of it. So it's gone...write me!"
posted by Paul Kenjerski 20:15
Does anyone else feel like work sucks?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 20:12
I'm directly in the middle of a double shift, so without pause I thought I'd update. I went out drinking last night and woke up late for work again. I had to take a few movies back. Then there was a dumbass in a corolla that decided to run the light on Ulmerton and 49th. I guess he wanted a closer look at the underside Semi. So there I sat for another 40 minutes. I was about 15 minutes late. Then they fired another guy in my area today. I hope I don't get fired
posted by Paul Kenjerski 20:11
Okay as you all know my Truck is falling apart. So recently I have been reduced to driving my mothers minivan to work, or given the joy of driving my fathers huge 95 Dodge Ram. Well the other day I was taking the minivan to work, when I jumped inside and first noticed "It smells kinda funny in here". I glanced around behind me to notice a cat in the backseat. I just sorta stared at him and he stared back. I then proceeded to jump out as quickly as possible and run. I then walked around to the other side and open the door so he could get out. He did and quickly found the nearest spot of shade. I went to get my mother and some water for the cat. He was gone when I came back. My mother must have shut him in there the night before when she was getting groceries out of the back. He was in there from about 7 pm til 3 pm the next day. He had tags on his neck so I suppose he had a home. Now the only problem is the smell left behind. That is the reason for the little tree shaped air fresheners from Walgreens. They are purple and they have a nice grape fragrance. Much better than the odourous smell of musty cat!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 20:04
I was in Walgreens today buying Ginseng Tea and some Car air fresheners (I'll explain later), when I saw this girl who works in the Photo department. She has long dark hair like I like. She most likely has a boyfriend already though. I can't imagine someone like her being alone. I have never walked up to a girl and asked her for a phone number, but in my old age, I'm getting kind of desperate. At least that's how it feels to me. Hows the weather in you part of town? I doubt anything will ever happen with me and her, but the thought is nice.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 19:52
I will be at work for the next 16 or so hours. So if anyone needs to talk to me call me..727-542-3404... This is my cell phone. I'm not stupid enough to give out my work number. What did you expect?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 19:47
I was just in the MSN news forum. Learned that most galaxies have a black hole in their center. It just seems kinda funny that there are billions of galaxies in this universe all spiraling toward their inevitable death. Makes me feel kinda like a cog in a giant machine. I like the universe am spiraling toward my death, in the endless cycle of death and rebirth. What comes must surely go.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 19:44
I just finished talking to Dyana again...It seems she has this problem of breaking up with someone after they get too close. I have the same problem in littler spurts. It makes me feel better to know that this was the reason she dumped me instead of my fault. It was some my fault, but anything a reasonable woman could look over. I will be shooting some more pics for the pic sections soon. I might ravamp the layout of the pages too. I don't really like how the pictures have now definitions... It was brought to my attention a while ago, but now I will be taking care of it! I think I broke my monitor at work...Shhhhhhh....don't tell anyone.. I was going to buy a Drum kit...but I lack the cordination to be a successful drummer. I like music...and trying to create it...I just lack any talent...I am better at ....when I figure what I am better at I'll let you know.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:22
I can see clearly now. Everything is in plain view. I never wanted love like I did before. It's all new and fresh. If you haven't heard my Girlfriend dumped me today. I don't even feel bad about it, I'm glad she did actually. She could do alot better. Lets face it "I SUCK". I was wondering when she would finally learn that. So now I am single, and I am not looking. I want to be alone. Why? you may ask. "Women are insane" this is the conclusion that I came to. I'm still in the market for a new car. I was looking at 2000 Camaro's but the insurance as I learned would kill me. Now I think I will just buy a beater and cruise it around. Insurance is such a stupid idea to begin with. I give you loads of money and then if I wreck my ride you give me a hard time and then complain alot...and then finally after much stress fix my car so that it is still fucked up, but looks decent. I hate Insurance...and the assholes who sell it. Dyana was a claims adjuster, so she can be excluded from this group. My biggest fault is I don't have enough time to be with her. She doesn't need a boyfriend, she needs more friends...I'd be her friend, but it would be tough because of the boyfriend/girlfriend thing. So I guess it's goodbye as usual.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 15:48
I am inferior
posted by Paul Kenjerski 00:34
Okay...WTF my truck broke down again. I'm going to look for a new car tommorrow. A friend of mine at work just showed me his new Honda. It was nice, I want a new car...I looked a bit before work, but all I found was overpriced crap. I want a new intrpeid or a slightly used one. I've also been looking at a few other cars, but it's such a pain. I hate shopping....I even hate shopping for cars even more.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 17:13
It's one of those nights when I can't sleep, and I want to express myself, but I can't. I can't play my guitar for shit ! I tried to write, but even that seems imposible. That made me think of Gavis, as I listen to Luckenbach Texas..she let me read her poem, something so private. My friend almost brother Ken isn't so well. I won't go into detail...because it's his privacy I might violate. This story all starts off with Jeff and the happy Pub. I want to cry...It just makes me look downward on this human race...Why would anyone want to make another human hurt? I can hear the idiot fuckers now...."We beat the fuck out of 'em" such childishness... I can honestly say I love Ken.. The recent weeks I feel we've grown apart, I've detached myself from him and Jeff. That's always how it is though, friends come and go. That's is not what is happening here though. This fucking world...I wanna quit my job! What has it done for me lately? Made me seperate from my friends and want things I didn't want before. All I want in the world is to be normal. But as the agent says humans aren't happy without some struggle and stress. All I want is a car, a house, a love and friends...and lastly happiness. Why is this so impossible? Why can't people be honest? Why can't things be better? Why do the sexes have to be so different? What the fuck? All I know is that I don't know nothing. It all always works out for the best usually..Stephanie had to leave so I could meet Dyana, but is this any better? Yes I think so....Dyana loves me back at least. One thing that bothers me is...I could look at Amy and see whole heartedly that she loved Ken, but what do I know...I'm still a student here...I keep getting taught "Don't trust anyone" is that what I am supposed to learn? There is only a few people I can trust...and two of them are my parents. Almost everyone I've ever met has been a disapointment. Those I know now, I keep expecting to grow into what all the others have been. Maybe things will work out, the funny way they always do. I just fear the loss I've always known.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:10
Things have been going well for me. I need to find a new car though, like pronto! My truck is begining to fall apart...Everytime I check the oil it's empty...it must run right through it...Piece of crap!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 22:18
I had her all to myself on thursday. It was good, I took her to meet Jeff and Ken, then too see my house. Then we just hung out at her house until about midnight. I left because she had to work the next day. I think I am begining to fall for her, I hope I don't get burned again. I doubt I will...but this earth is an odd place.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 22:17
So I worked the midnight shift last night, and came back to work today at four. I only got about 5 hours of sleep. I'm kinda tired right now, but it's all good. I have wednesday and thursday off, so I will be hanging out with Dyana a bit. On thursday I'm going to have her all to myself!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 21:42
Every time I get out my old picture album...I reminisce about old times. It makes me feel all odd inside. I miss the friendships I used to have. I miss the people I haven't seen in years and months. I suppose I'll look back upon right now and miss it, from some vantage point in the future. I feel lost and left out, just because I don't speak to most of the friends I had even 6 months ago. I hang out with a totally new group of people these days. Jeff, Ken and Amy are the only ones I still talk too, and even now we have so much happening in our lives that I rarely see them. I miss Wendy. I miss Jennifer. I miss Bob. I miss Stephanie. I miss Jessica. I miss Jamie. I miss Dave. I miss Mary. I miss Jenny. I miss Amanda. I miss Corey. I miss Chance. I miss Liz. I miss Justin. I miss Melissa. I miss you all.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 22:54
Coffee, Coffee, Coffee how can i possibly explain the ways in which i love you. You give me energy to stay awake when i'm tired. You make me all warm inside when I'm cold. You are my friend Coffee, coffee, COFFEE...!!!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 21:58
RANCID 2000 is being reviewed, right now, by me! This album reminds me of the old RANCID I knew from their first two albums. The first track named "Don Giovanni" is loosely based upon the opera bearing the same name. Track three is a remake of a old Bob Dylan song. Song 18 "Dead Bodies" reminds me of post nuclear time when half dead Zombies roam the earth in search of BRAINS...."Blackhawk Down" is kinda cool in it's own screaming death accidental way. Rattlesnake reminds me of all the friends that have bit me in the back, when I was least expecting it. "Ex. Dave is a Rattlesnake". I thoroughly enjoyed this album. At first it was dissapointing, just because it was so short, just under forty minutes. Then the more I listened to it and started paying attention to the words. Theres alot in there if you can understand Tim's drable....I give it 3 and 3/4 star's....Definately worth the listen.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 17:12
I think I'm getting fucking sick....my throat hurts.....Damn it.....Fuck Fuck Fuck....!!!!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:51
Subway has new bread. 4 new kinds, the only thing is...it's stale by the time u get it because nobody orders the new bread. So come on.....order the new bread.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:49
It's funny how things can go so wrong, so soon. I woke up late today, about 12:45. Dyana called and woke me up. It was nice to be woken up by my girlfriend. I got up and took a shower and got dressed. I wrote Dyana a E-mail at work then we wrote back and forth for a few minutes. Then I tried to call her, but I got her voicemail..She called back a few moments later. I was kinda pissed because I accidently erased my Rate my picture account. I was trying to find out what I had done. She was a bit pissed because her computer just crashed, and she was hungry because the food delivery person screwed wasn't there after an hour. I really wasn't talking and she got upset because I was distracted. I'd give anything for it to all go away.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:46
Things are going extremely well for me lately. Work is going good, I couldn't ask for a more perfectly suited job for me. My only worry is job security, until april of next year when I will be moving onward...hopefully. I have been dating Dyana for nearly 2 weeks now. She seems perfect in alot of ways. She is sweet, smart, cute, intelligent, caring, and most of all likes me back. She has a 3 year old son named Alan. To be totally honest I'm still not quite sure about the child thing, but he is a awesome kid. Anyways we are just dating now so, it really shouldn't matter..... right? Anyways...I am in the market for a new car. I have my eye on a Dodge Intrepid. I'm not sure why, I think it might be too big of a car, and I've been told it's a family car, but I still want it. This is where the job security fits in. If I get payments on a car, I don't want to lose my job...and get it repo'd. I don't think this will be much of a problem though. I can afford $300 a month payments easy, I save that much a month in my savings...and I spend like crazy...so the only questions are job security and financing....So I must clarify these two parameters before proceding. Wish me luck..
posted by Paul Kenjerski 23:46
I've been lazy, but that's okay. I've moved into my new house a few days ago. It's a nice house. I really don't like the pink carpet, but hey it has a roof and air conditioning so it's all good. My room is a mess, clothes are everywhere. I have to get ready for work soon. The Roadrunner guy was here earlier, installing my cable modem. He left a wire across my front yard. He said a technician would be out on tuesday to run it through the attic. I can't wait...I keep tripping over it. I'll be taking some pictures soon of the new house and updating the Miscellania pic page accordingly, so stay tuned...till then I'm out.....peace..
posted by Paul Kenjerski 13:26
Okay...being sick just sucks. I haven't been doing much of anything lately. Eating alot and keeping full of fluids. Shut up Jeff.... Dayquil still sucks. .... The house is supposed to close on monday, but who knows what will happen. I'm still staying in the hotel on the beach. I try to stay away from there as much as possible. I really hate that place. I bought a few new shirts the other day, because I have no clean laundry. Life sucks what can I say. I am tired of typing now, so I'll catch u later.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:01
I AM SICK. and I am at work..I wanna go home. It's a chest cold, and my throat is a bit sore. Dayquil sucks... I think I would like to be in my bed and drinking tea..and eating soup. I hate being sick even more than moving. The worst part is having a bed in a hotel room, it's not like home. What is it about me, I mean little innocent me that is so attractive to a damn Virus. The virus is going to lose, why even try. Stupid virus...It's fighting a war, and for what? To lose. It's going to accomplish nothing..except making me miserable and killing itself. So I ask you virus. what's the point?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 17:23
I met the most interesting person yesterday, or rather early this morning. I met her online, as with most of my recent new friends. I guess she is what you could call a freak, but I mean that in the most respect. I wish I could be a freak, but my life won't let me. I respect her for that. Her name is Gavis, really her name is Lindsey. We went to Denny's last night.What else is there to do on a sunday night after midnight? We ate she had buffalo chicken strips, I had french toast. The we left to the parking lot where we sat on her sticker covered car till about 5 A.M. We talked about all sorts of things but she never lost my attention. She is the most interesting person I believe I have ever met. I put a picture of her in the friends section of my photo area.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:44
So there I was kneedeep in K-mart, when I decided okay I gota get outta here before I put more stuff in my cart. I headed to the front of the store. That's when I saw it. The legendary express lane. It only had one person in it.... I pushed my cart full speed and made it right in time. I waited for a few minutes. Then I looked up to see the guy in front of me had a whole cart full of clearanced clothes. His oriental wife was piling them up on the counter. I counted 43 pieces before I gave up..Now I was highly pissed. I had begun to imagine myself bashing this fucker in the ankle with my cart. This fucking pissed me off, but I never was the violent type. So I just stood there and waited. The cashier was incredibly slow and stupid too. I could feel the pressure cooker boiling inside me.......I was waiting to explode. Then the prick turns around and smiles. I wanted just to deck him in his old gay ass nose. I made the remark "Can't count today? huh" He just laughed and turned around. Now at about this time I wanted to take my box of Triscuits and bash him in the head repeatedly. I wanted just to push him out of the express lane with my cart....Ughhhh... It was over shortly after he paid and then just fucking stood there. What now? His bitch wife was checking the reciept...I could take it no longer..I pushed in front of him and threw my 5 things on the counter...The cashier smiled and rang me up. The guy behind me mumbled something about inconsiderate young kids...I turned around and smiled...Then I payed and pushed my way past him. I could hear him mubling in the background...but I didn't care.... On the way out I had happy thought sof running him down in the parking lot...happy happy thoughts..
posted by Paul Kenjerski 17:29
I awoke in my sleep last night to find myself in a room abask in a blue haze. I got up from my bed and walk to where I thought the door should be, but there was no door. I turned to see a light behind me. I walked toward the light. It seemed far of in the distance. As I walked toward the light it changed colors from blue to a pale yellow color. Then I realized that I might be dead. I stopped almost in my tracks. Thoughts of "At least I'm not in hell" went through my head. I suppose this is a bit strange for you to understand, but for me it was even tougher. I thought "I don't wanna be dead." I turned away from the light and ran in the opposite direction. I was now screaming into the silence and pleading to god "I don't wanna be dead". Then the floor of this space dropped out, and I was falling into the darkness. With a splash I landed upon the shore of a peaceful beach. I laughed thinking I had escaped heaven and had been returned back to earth. I sat there in the sand breathing the salty air deep into my lungs. I looked out across the water, when I saw the ship coming I stood up, and waved. "Hey..I'm over here...save me..." The boat turned. It was an older sail boat. One from the classical times, it was made of wood and had a tall white mast with sails that were more beautiful than anything I had ever seen. I waded out into the water to meet it. I t was getting closer. I could see it's sailors waving and one climbing up the mast to the nest above. They did not make a sound, the only sound was me screaming at the top of my lungs. "I'm saved.." and I thought I had been. It was now just within distance to see.. I was horrified at it's inhabitants. They were mear skeletons dressed in pirate uniforms. I screamed louder now. They were throughing things at me. And then came the net. It was heavy and held my head under the water. I was gasping for air. I closed my eyes and let the air from my lungs escape...up in bubbles my life and air trickled from my body. I was now lifeless and remained floating in the water as my body was hauled above the ship by the skeleton pirates. I was being dispersed by the waves and fading away. I was being absorbed by the water, slowly I trickeled away into nothingness.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 17:01
I stayed the night in a hotel down on Mad. beach. It is one of those high priced touristy places. I woke up early this morning with a chill in the air. It seems I left the A.C. on. I got up and shut it off. There was a knock at the door. I walked over to the door with my blanket wrapped around my neck kind of like a cloak. The door opened up to reveal the hotel maid. I could see by the tag on her chest her name was June. That's my birthday, it must be my lucky day. She asked if I needed a change of sheets, I shook my head and she came in. I turned to the refrigerator and slowly walked over too it. I opened it to reveal a bareness like the sahara. The maid giggled, as I turned around to ask why she giggled. She just laughed and looked back towards the bed. I sat down at the table as she changed the sheets. She turned toward me and said "We have a free complimentary breakfast in the lobby". I shook my head in an up and down motion and she giggled again. She left soon after, I decide it was about time to get in the shower. I looked around my room for a toothbrush. I found one on the bathroom sink. One of those cheap hotel room toothbrushes. I sneared at it then brushed my teeth religiously. I was about finished when I heard another knock on the door. I grabbed a towel off the rack and wrapped it around me. I walked toward the door and opened it a little. It was June the maid again. She had her arms full and pushed her way in the door. She set down upon the table more food than I myself could eat for breakfast in five days. I said thank you. She just giggled and sat down. I went back to the bathroom and put on my jeans from the night before. I came back out and sat across from her. I said "Wow, this is really great thank you. Is this going to get you in trouble?" She looked up and said "No, it's my break." I ate till I was full, and then I ate some more. When I was finished I said thank you again. She smiled and said "No problem, I was hungry too.... I didn't want too eat in the cafeteria again." I told her to leave the dishes and I would bring them down when I was leaving for the day. It was the least I could do. I walked her over to the door, and said goodbye. I watched her walk down the hall. She got down to the stairway and turned around to see me staring.. She smiled and waved and was then gone...
posted by Paul Kenjerski 20:49
I've been here most of the day. I don't know why. Can u tell me?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 19:24
Jesus don't want me for a sunbeam.
Sunbeams are not made like me. Don't expect me to cry. For all the reasons you had to die. Don't ever ask your love of me. Don't expect me to cry, don't expect me to lie. Don't expect me to die for thee. Don't expect me to cry, don't expect me to lie. Don't expect me to die, don't expect me to cry. Don't expect me to lie, don't expect me to die for thee. -Kurt Cobain
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:34
I left my old house at 1pm today, theres no TV so what am I gonna do there? I went to my friend Jeff's house feeling a little hungry. So we headed to Hops. Now ordinarily this wouldn't be a problem but I gotta work today. So here I am at work nice and toasty. I don't really mind though, you know. Fuck it. I like my job. Except for days when there is better stuff to do. Tonight is the first day of Football. Monday night Football, and I'm gonna miss it. This sucks..but oh well no big deal.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 15:53
I am officially homeless.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 15:49
Today is a slow day at work, what do I suspect for sunday though. A few people here are sick. The flu or something. I think I'm getting it. THIS SUCKS I love e-mail write me...please.. kenjerski@yahoo.com The pizza I ordered just got here...gotta go....
posted by Paul Kenjerski 19:52
I'm just about done moving. I wrote Erin yesterday and she wrote back, it's always nice to know that a girl in a picture on the internet actually is real. Nevertheless it doesn't help my love life too much. Today is pizza day at work, their will be four of us so we can order a big pizza today. I can't wait.... I chatted with marianne yesterday, she seems really nice and sweet. She said she might be moving to orlando. I went to the pub last night with my good friend Jeff, I drank 2 pints of Newcastle. Then I went home, directly home, no other place but home. I did not stop by the dairy section at Kash-&-Karry. I went straight home. Ha... Ha.. whatever... I needed some relaxing, after all the stress I've been under lately. I guess my Grandmother is mortally ill, and I have no place to live as of Tuesday. But me being homeless is really the least of my worries, it's just we've been moving like crazy and I've been working everyday, I hate it.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:37
I'm a father well kinda, my Habenero pepper plant produced it's first pepper. I have it with me at work. It turned brite orange. In other news, I HATE MOVING...... I have been published well kinda. I sent a short story to www.allidiots.com and they posted it. I'm so proud. Of course I'm no Shakespeare. It was raining earlier today so I had to postpone moving, damn...that is just too bad.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 17:46
Boycott the RIAA....
posted by Paul Kenjerski 19:10
Save Napster....
posted by Paul Kenjerski 19:08
Save Napster !!!!! Boycott the RIAA! Click Here!
posted by Paul Kenjerski 17:05
We'll my house is empty, except for my computer and a few other neccessities. I hate moving...I still have to move the Weight Machine, that heavy piece of crap...I HATE MOVING.....
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:25
All you idiots should visit here. You know who you are so just get going. This means you Jeff.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:23
I went to MSN today and whta did I see? I saw a picture of Lars smiling. What a giant DICK! I hate him, and I hate Metallica. I'll never buy another one of there albums. Although I do have every song they've ever put out in MP3 format. Not that I even like them at all, in fact I hate them, and that is why I have those MP3s. I never even listen to them, but I do have them. Fuck you Metallica. But even those dicks or the supreme court can't shut down technolgy. There is a program called Gnutella, it's like napster, but it has no main server to connect to. So there is nothing to shut down. I suggest d/ling it and spread the word. For long it will be shut down too, but if we have it already them it's too late. And there within lies the beauty. Jeff blows goats.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:19
I hate moving, it makes me sweaty and stinky. Liquid Cocaine tastes good....but I think it's not worth it because I had the worst hangover ever this morning. Ever....but on the lighter side, I've downloaded 2 new rancid tracks off there new album that isn't out yet. They sound good....Thank god I have a computer. Which reminds me Napster will be going down tonite, what a pity. Must everything beautiful be destoyed by the Man. Damn the Man...I guess it's back to anonymous FTPing for Mp3's, and hunting them down..It's gonna suck. Good luck guys. Jeff screws goats.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 20:35
I'm so sleepy, I missed some sleep a few days ago, and just caught up today. I didn't wake up till 2 p.m. and my house is such a mess now. All the packing to move. Did I mention I was moving. Yep... I hate moving. I wish I could just leave my stuff. Not really... I love my stuff. That's probably one of the reasons I'm still living at home. I hope you like the sound I added to this page. I can't say if I like it yet...Well see.. I seriously wonder why CGS pays me. I don't do much of anything, except work on this site. Thank god I have internet access. I think I would die without internet at work, seriously mentally die...
posted by Paul Kenjerski 18:17
It's raining, it's pouring, my job is boring.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:07
Maybe it's the long dark hair (which I have always liked) or those eyes that seem to bounce of the screen like they were really looking back, but I have fallen in love. It's not real love of course, but mearly blind intrigue. I found myself reading every square inch of the journals and staring stupidly at those perfect pictures. And she is an intellectual giant, at least compared to me. I think I may never leave her page. Forget food, forget air, I think I'm content.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 09:27
Oh yeah before I forget...CLICK HERE to get to Jeff's page
posted by Paul Kenjerski 08:42
My friend Jeff finally has his website up, and I must say it's kinda small but not bad for his first one. It only took me a whole of seven minutes to break in and steal this funny ass pictureof Jeff. I found a picture of his girlfriend there also, but out of fear I do not publish here. I am not a complete moron, no matter what my father says.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 08:26
This is the first week of the Lottery pool at work. We are all sitting here dreaming about what we could buy, and what we would do. I said I would move to the woods and live in a cabin, far away from anyone and anything. I'd have a fenced in game reserve all around and live off the land, and grow a garden. I think this would be a cool idea. Maybe you should just call me the una-bomber. I need to go now, and work on my manifesto.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 21:12
Working now, I think I need a drink.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 21:06
Say it with me...WTF
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:19
I need to learn some Flash now, it seems to be kicking the crap out of HTML. Damn and I just got good at HTML. What was I thinking?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 00:23
It's SUPERBAD. This is one strange trip into a confusing forest. I mean you might as well throw the map out the damn window.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 00:22
Looking for the cutting edge of internet design? I mean these guys all kick the crap out of my site. These guys are good. So check'em out.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 00:20
Okay the future has arrived. Kinda quick huh? Well I added the Meanings page, it's just a list of strange and original words thought of by me and my friends. I've also sorted the picture page, in order to make it faster. I think it's still slow though. Step two is done though. Enjoy.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 18:14
I'm sorta rearranging and making this site mo'betta so prepare for alot of little gliches in the near future.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:19
Relationships are so tough. Even if they are just simple friendships. It is so hard to find someone in life with the same direction as you. Love is a whole nother realm all together. Friends don't have to devote one another to each other, but lovers do. I have yet to find a woman who will give me what I truly cherish... herself. My wants are simple and should be taken seriously. I want a wife who will stick by me and I will stick by her. I want the house with 2.5 kids. The sunday golf games, and to grow old with her by my side, with mutual loving respect. I grew up thinking that everyone wanted this, and at one point in time I think they all do, but with in the the time which they grow, things change or happen and nothing is ever the same. The women I meet never want the same, and what am I to do?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 01:34
Yesterday as I was driving I came across a police radar machine, what was the first thing I think? How fast can I go !! I am dissapointed to say I only got up to 48. It wasn't my fault. There was traffic. I looked up in the mirror just in time to see the guy behind me come skidding to a stop, then he laughed and pointed to the Radar machine. So apparently I'm not the only person with this idea. I wonder what purpose these machines serve anyway? I mean I already know how fast I'm going, and I can guessimate about the other people around me. These Radar enforcers are totally useless if you ask me. Other than being fun, which I don't think is their purpose. I'd like to steal one, and put it beside the runway at the Tampa International Airport. I wonder if it goes over a hundred. Cheap piece of crap probably does not. I'd like to test it, but my car is way to frail and slow. I'd need a down hill, well practically a freefall to reach a hundred. I hate my car.....
posted by Paul Kenjerski 13:24
My friend Jeff is trying to build a webpage. I doubt with his inferior knowledge of HTML he can. He was supposed to put up a rather funny picture of me. I challenge him too, if he ever gets it up and going I'll put a link here so everyone can see. I wore a tie to work today, just because I felt like it.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 15:53
Ever try those Tostitos with the dash of lime? They are surprisingly good. The ones with the red pepper are pretty good too. But when I eat the lime ones I think I need a Corona... I need a Corona, and a hug.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:19
Something that just pissed me off...- "It's not my job"....and why? I mean your job is to help me...F*ck it.. Then I guess it's not my job, I'm gonna go in Unavailable mode and go smoke a Cigarette. See if I ever come in an hour early again.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 15:32
Well I'm at work an hour early. I had to make up some time from whence I took a lunch on last saturday. Driveing was good today, not much crazy traffic. I did stop at albertsons to buy some work munchies and a bottle of water. There was a guy in front of me that spaced out his food just enough so that I had to hold mine for an extra few minutes. That sorta pissed me off. Then on the way out I noticed he had parked in a handicapped spot, but he wasn't crippled. He was driving a Infiniti J30. The Dick. I hate those over the hill yuppies that drive nice cars and do as they please. I was almost compelled to jump behind his car as he was backing out and yell "Ahhh my leg" but when have I ever been so impulsive? No I am off to work. Bye...
posted by Paul Kenjerski 15:17
So for those interest in where I work, heres a rather boring pictureThere I waste 8 hours a day 40 hours a week, trading my life for paper money. I think I would like to hit the lottery now. Please....God just gimme this one little thing.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 02:02
Yesterday was a dark and rather crappy rainy day, but looks can be decieving. I met a girl yesterday, her name was Marianne. I talked to her for about 6 Hrs last night. I think I really like her alot, I hope she is just as perfect in real life as on the phone. The thing I like most so far about her is her intelligence, for so long I've been loooking for a girl with an actual brain, and now I've found one. What am I going to do?
posted by Paul Kenjerski 17:01
It's saturday, it's raining, and I'm at work. Just imagine my excitement. As I was driving here I was raining really bad, and all the stupid people had there blinkers on and were driving oh so friggin slow. They were trying to make me late, I just know it. I only saw one wreck after the bridge in Tampa. A mustang had spun around and smacked into a wall that divided the highway. I mean when the pavement changes and you see lots of water just sitting there, wouldn't you slow down? Stupid people. Other than the slow people and the one wreck, driving was decent.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 15:39
I've been sitting at my desk for a while now eating cookies. I hadn't noticed but I've become covered in crumbs. I think if this keeps up I will get big and fat and turn into just an all around slob.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 19:53
I'm at work right now, I can't say I'm excited. I guess alot of shit hit the fan earlier today. My old manager got transfered to a different building, because she got complained about or something. Who knows around here... She was always cool with me, just a little bitchy at times.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 16:33
Ugh...I hate waking up. Must . . .Brush. . .Teeth. I have to go buy office supply CRAP today. I hate those stores, basically because I used to work at one. I need to take pictures too. Then I think I will...hmmmmm go drink beer....yes... a good plan..
posted by Paul Kenjerski 13:32
Note to self "Download Stone temple pilot Mp3's"
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:35
I bought a cool digital camera today, and went fishing. This is my friend Satan.Okay it's Ken and he's been drinking.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 03:22
I just ate a Banquet TV dinner. It had a "New and Improved" tray. I guess "New and Improved" means less food, more tray. Otherwise it was quite tastey. I recommend the Turkey. What am I complaining about, it only cost a buck.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 20:25
I think I've become obsessed. Check out the 1-800-Collect area.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 19:37
Two dirty little Farters. You may recognize them, but I never knew they had there own show.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 19:26
A most interesting site maintained by Zannah.
posted by Paul Kenjerski 19:15
